A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend slept with someone else! And now our relationship is over. I asked him why he did it and he said because he was high - Look, i know that alcohol and drugs can make you lose your inhibitions and judgement, but is this really a valid explanation???? I thank you all for your advice and/or opinions.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): If you ran down someone whilst driving would you be let off if you were drunk? "No officer, I can explain, I was drunk!" "Oh, I see, well you're free to go - it wasn't your fault, it was the alcohols!"
If you've decided to move on then good for you, you deserve someone who has more self control and never forgets a picture of you in their mind that stops them from ever straying. All the best..
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): That is a rubbish excuse for sleeping with another girl behind his girlfriend's back. Couldn't he have come up with a better one? As for finishing the relationship with him that was a good move. Now find someone for your next relationship in which won't cheat on you. Or take drugs and large amounts of alcohol. Or has a rubbish excuse for sleeping with a girl whilst in a relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou all are right! And while I was reading your responses, I realized this: He put himself in the situation of still being with her, etc. It's one thing to be using drugs or alcohol (even though it's not a good thing), but it's quite another to put yourself in the situation of having sex with someone! He still performed the intricacies of driving home after the encounter - so then why couldn't he have simply said, 'No.' I now see it. Thanks to you all!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): This is rubbish and well you know it. Get rid of him now, he has slept with someone else, let you know and now what does he expect to happen. Don't wait around for him to come out with anymore rubbish just get rid of him now.
Take care
xx
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A
female
reader, elsie +, writes (30 March 2007):
 the circumstance that led to him being alone and sleeping with someone else is what would wind me up the most.he obviously managed to get into a cab or whatever and get himself alone with her.it amazes me how they blame the drink etc for being out of it but still manage the deed.hmmmm.were you getting on with each other?is your relationship good otherwise?even if it is youll will have a mountain to climb hoping that you can recover from this.hes got a lot of groundwork to do.personally id elbow him.youll be sick one way or the other and you can cut your losses and know you arent exposed to him doing it again.really hope you feel better soon.
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A
female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (30 March 2007):
 No its not a valid excuse. He was with you. He should not have lost control enough to put him in that position.
If someone loves someone, or cares for them or wants to be with them they do not act in that way.
Alcohol and drugs are just an excuse to say oh but I was drunk and so on, and they wouldnt have done it otherwise,blah blah etc etc... in the hope that that lets them off the hook!
Its cheating, and in my book there is never any excuse for it, weak moments, didnt know how to finish with her first,I didnt mean to, I still love you and it didnt mean anything all that type stuff, I was drunk and so on... they are all rubbish!
Take care x
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (30 March 2007):
 A lot of people do lose complete control of themselves when they're drunk or high on drugs but I still don't think that's a good excuse. He's bound to know how drink and drugs make him feel and how there was a risk he might lose him inhibitions. Also, you don't really want to be with someone who uses drink or drugs, but especially those people who will use the fact that they do as an excuse. For what it's worth I think you did the right thing.
CD
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