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female
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*ish
writes: I started dating my guy back in November,when we met he had a girlfriend but eventually he left her completely.Though we have an age difference he has always gotten along with my family.The problems started about6 months ago when I noticed a mysterious number in his phone,when I confronted him about it he told me that it was on of his male friends from work.Then I started seeing the number more often and then all times of the night. So one night I answered it while he was asleep,to find out that the person was definetly a female.He had cheated on me and girlfriend was happy to let me know it,I was furious but when I confronted him about it the next morning he flipped the script and caught an attitude with me for answering his phone.He Swore that he wasnt seeing her and that it wasnt serious,I believed him.About 3 months after that she had still been calling,He refused to discuss it and he insisted thatsheonly a friend and no sexual activity had been going on. Then I decided to find out for myself so I answered his phone again one day and had a very heated convo with his mystery girl and she revealed that their relationship was definetly sexual.When confronted my guy told me that she was only a friend now, that he had only had sex with her once and it wasnt that serious.When I insisted that he tell her to stop calling he told me NO he wasnt going to be mean to her. I pleaded with him and he refused insisting that it was innocent now.I cried so much in those months just from knowing that my man was getting satisfaction from another woman I felt like,Why cant he talk to me why cant he be satisfied with me.Everytime he leaves I feel like breaking down and falling apart just because I WANT HIM TO WANT TO STAY JUST AS MUCH AS I WANT HIM TO STAY,AND HE NEVER DOES.To this day this female is still in the picture and I get more and more frustrated everyday he told me that she's cool and she's funny and he swears that it is innocent but how can I be okay with him having her as a friend if I know that she's had my man where I never want any other woman to have him IN BED!.I feel like I am not enough for him anymore because he wont even cut her off for me, He tells me he loves me and he tells me that I have nothing to worry about he tells me to stop thinking so much and that he doesn't call her she calls him. I know that's a lie though because I check his call logs and not only does he answer her calls when I am not around he also returns them.I dont know what to do I Love My Man Unconditionally and I am terrified by the fact of him leaving me especially for another woman.I only want him to look at it from my prospective and see much I am stressin over this. I am a highschool grad and I cant focus on anything else but him I feel like my whole life is going craxy and it's all bacause I am giving him so much power over my emotions but I dont know what to do Im afraid of losing my man and it is very mind wrecking.Why is he doing this and how do I get through it I want to walk out of this with my manb on my arm now someone else's.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2006): He is a dishonest person. Who is he to act all mighty and switch the roles that you have done a great offense...what a weasel...and that is probably an insult to weasels.
He has proven to be untrustworthy and now you have the role of checking up on him...this isn't how a loving relationship should be when it is built upon a foundations of trust and respect.
He needs to change his phone number and promise to not contract her and then keep the promise. He needs to prove to you that you are the one and this would be no big problem for him to accomplish; he will want to because he loves you.
If he finds fault in this; he isn't going to change, he is cheating and get rid of this man. He will only continue to lie and cheat and this in turn will slowly destroy you. He wants you to be some weak woman who will put up with his cheating.
It is serious as he lied to about this sex once. He does what he wants when he wants and doesn't once, think about you and how much you matter to him because Honey you don't.
Leave the insensitive, lying, using Idiot.
That isn't love Honey. He tells you what he knows will keep you at his side. He shouldn't be answering the phone when some other floozy calls him; that is a most pathetic excuse.
Get some counselling. Couples counselling. The counsellor will help him see you side.
It is robbing you of joy, peace, and love and that is not a healthy relationship.
This man loves you and means it he will be willing to get some couples counselling and he will be willing to change his number and phone service and abstain from calling the other woman.
This man does not deserve your love; look what he thinks of it Sweetie...he DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU.
I hope you get strong and remember that you are a good, beautiful woman who is worthy of a decent, loving, reliable, trustworthy man's love.
*hugs*
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