A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I became friendly with a guy who did work for me. We became friends on facebook so I suppose lost the trader/customer boundary. However he has let me down a few times now but if I have posted about needing something ie a code checker for my car or to borrow a suitcase from someone he was in there like a shot and offered to help me. I don't quite get it with him but I do get on ok with him. It's such a shame that he refuses to want to do work for me anymore but without asking him why any thoughts why he will do the one thing but not the other or can a bloke on here understand why he is doing it.
View related questions:
facebook Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2019): Tradesman will sometimes do occasional favors. Once they feel they've known you awhile, you'll have a friendly-professional relationship. It becomes difficult to establish a cost for services. If he declines doing something; then it means go ask or hire somebody else. I wouldn't make a big issue of it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2019): Any work to do with my house would always be paid. It was the fact when I asked if anyone could help me in general 're the car and suitcase only, it was him that contacted me, I didn't go to him about it. However you are probably right 're the boundary thing I should now move on and find a new tradesman to do the work.
...............................
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (21 July 2019):
 Those are quick easy favours as opposed to work which tends to be more involved.
Also, while being paid for services rendered can be liberating for many as it keeps the boundaries clear and frees folks of being indebted, for some it creates expectations. He's not comfortable being hired by someone who is now a friend.
Friends have different expectations than customers do, which is why it's best to keep the two separate.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (21 July 2019):
 Do you expect for the work you need done to be done for free?
Or do you offer REAL payment for it?
Just because you are friendly with someone and in NEED of help, posting it on social media doesn't entitle you to anything.
He doesn't OWE you squat. And he might prefer to keep his job out of a new acquaintance.
You can ASK for help and if you get it, you get it and if not, then you might have to look for a tradesman (mechanic/garage) to fix your car or a thrift-store for a secondhand suitcase.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2019): I think you may have identified the problem yourself - you've broken down the professional boundary between you. Maybe it's more than the Facebook, and he doesn't want to do paid work for someone he likes.
Or it may be something completely unrelated to you. Tradesmen often have many jobs on and he might be busy. Or maybe there's something else. Probably best to ask him if you want to be certain.
...............................
|
