A
female
,
*oval31
writes: My boyfriend offered to help me by taking my winning lottery ticket to the claim center for me. It was a good idea because I cannot leave the house as I take care of my mother on life support. The claim center took the funds and applied it to his outstanding student loans. Although apologetic- he has made no attempts to replace the money and has said that he has intentions to do so. If he paid it back on a monthly issue- it would be ok- but he will not commit to a payment plan. I am a minimum wage earner - and he is not. He does not seem to have the compassion to pay it back. He is renting my mom's house and never pays on the first. When I bring the money up in conversation-he runs and says his feelings are hurt. Trust is broken- please advise how to explain that I need my money without hurting his feelings. He is 57.
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male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (5 August 2006):
I'm guessing we're talking about a large amount of money and not something like £10 here...Guy's a thief! You can bust him on grand larceny (new word, let me know if I spelt it right:-P).To hell with his feelings, get a payment plan sorted out so that he ends up giving the money back. The least he could've done is asked if he could use the money but to pretend he's gonna do you a favour and then steal your money? Thats really low... Forget his feelings, think about your own for now
A
female
reader, snowbird +, writes (5 August 2006):
Here, here!! I agree with all the others on this one - he has taken advantage of you in the most despicable way possible, and I would tell him that he should have taken YOUR feelings into account before stealing from you..All theives say they 'will give it back'...pity they don't ask in the first place! I hope you kick his sorry ass all the way to court, and then some. Get this piece of excrement out of your life - but not before getting YOUR money back!!!
Sorry if it sounds offensive, but this just about takes the p***!!! OH, I am SO, SO ANGRY for you- just going for an aspirin and a lie down...Grrr! Get justice, girl!!
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (5 August 2006):
He is a 57 year old scrounger who has mooched his way through life with the 'don't hurt me' line. He is 57 and not 18, and you are not doing him or womankind any favours by letting him get away with stealing from you. It sends a message that it is ok to take from you and other people.
He has identified that you are a vulnerable woman as caring for a relative can be a very stressful and isolating job! He has probably behaved this way in the past with dozens of women. No one with any self respect would steal money from you. He is not your 'boyfriend', he is your pet parasite. You should make him give you the money back either by insisting that he makes monthly standing order payments to your bank (you can get the forms posted to you by your bank) or a cheque for the full amount. Impose a deadline and put everything in writing with his and yours name. When the relationship turns sour...I am sure you know he isn't going to pay and may leave when he realises he doesn't have any more freebies...you can take him to the small claims court and the more documentation you have the better. You should also contact the lottery agency in writing to report him to them - I am sure they will take the matter seriously as it is fraud - he misrepresented himself to them as the winning ticket holder to have the funds released.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2006): so let me get this straight - this man took YOUR winning lottery ticket money, and used it on HIMSELF?!?! yet you're worried about hurting his feelings?? WHY?? this man totally robbed you. did he have your best interests in mind, and try to spare your feelings when he did this to you?? i think not. he was only thinking of himself, that selfish jackass. if i were you, not only would i not try to spare his feelings in the least bit, but i'd also kick the crap out of him. that's completely unacceptable and dispicable. i hate him for you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2006): Hurting his feelings? For heaven's sake, this man has robbed you!! Why in the world are you worried about hurting his feelings? Sounds like a ploy on his part to avoid talking about what he has done.
I don't know what else to tell you, but perhaps you'd better go to a legal aid center. He is acting like scum.
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