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female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I'm hoping for some good advice. I'm a very devoted wife, and a good mother. I would do anything for my family and keeping my marriage alive. I love my husband, he is a good man. But few years ago he stopped being intimate with me. He has problems with getting an erection, and slowly he turned away from me totally.We went to the doctors and other helping places, he is healthy, nobody knows what is going on with him. He wouldn't even look at me any more. He says he loves me and things should get better sometimes. But I wonder when?It's almost the forth year of this condition. He never hugs me in bed or initiates any cuddling. I would fully trust him and help him every way, if I would know, he has a medical condition. But this way, I don't know what's going on, what is the future of us, and when is he going to dump me? It's very hurtful to live like this, also I do miss intimacy, as we had very good sex before.What should I do? Should I wait? Or should I leave?I'm very frustrated, and full of fear of the future. thanks for listening
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female
reader, godireallyneedhelp  +, writes (14 December 2008):
There is a number of possibles for the sudden cold shoulder you seem to be getting from your husband. So I'm just gonna throw these out there for you to consider.1: He may be feeling insecure about his sexual performance2: Some guys phsycologically convince themselves that once you are married that the excitment in sex goes down, so they may stop trying to initiate it3: He may be having an affair4: He may simply just want out of the relationship5: He also may be bored of your basic sexual routine6: Something distressing may be going on in his life that he doesn't want you to know about.7: he feels like he's not satisfying you enoughThe best thing to do is COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE! Talk to your husband and try to understand how he's feeling about the situation. You don't need therapy or anything just yet, that might make him feel more embaressed about the issue
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2008): Two possible suggestions babes, one you will like, and one you won't...
A uncle on Dear Cupid explained to me that older men can lose testerone, and that causes them to loose all sexual desire. He says it's very hard to identify, but it there are tests you can run, if your doctor is knowledgeable enough. Depression is a consequence and this can lead your husband to turn away from you. It is treatable with male hormone Testerone, just like older women sometimes need an extra shot of HRT, Oestrogen..... Solution One...
Solution two.... He may be having an affair......
I don't know your husband, you say he's a good man and you trust him.
Let's go for solution one, back to the doctors and ask for examinations into depression and low Testerone. This might just do the trick...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2008): this guy is playing with your head,he knows what is wrong but to much of a coward to tell you,dump him sooner rather than later
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A
female
reader, MutantKitten +, writes (14 December 2008):
 Counselling. You need private counselling, and maybe couples counselling. You shouldn't have to suffer like this, something's going on.
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