A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:There is this guy I know and he seems like a real cool guy that I want to get to know better. Well he asked me out and we are going out soon. The only problem is we talked (as friends) for a while and he was telling me that he has a lot of female friends and he becomes real flirty with them-it's just who he is. But then I remembered he told me before that in 3 cases, he slept with three of his female friends by "accident". It wasn't planned each time, they all just happened. Now, he also said he never has cheated, but 3 times?!? Sould I be concerned with all the female friends he has?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2006): A agree with Smeedle's words. In the end, trust will the
deciding factor. It appears like this guy's past behaviours are raising a few doubts that is causing you pause and think hard. More people should be like you and do exactly that..thinking wisely and making smart choices. It show you have self-value and boundries of what you want in relationships. This guy likes to flirt with female friends, he has had spontaneous sexual daillances with 3 of these women. If I were in your shoes, I would be quite wary until he proved otherwise. But people do change but we proof over the long term, is wise to insist upon. You have to remember, that over the long run, if you were to date him...it's him who makes the decision, about his loyalty and faithfulness to you. Nothing can control that behaviour but him. If you can't trust his word on something so important, then you will never trust him and 'that' is what you look at. If you don't believe he is capable of being faithful, then move on, because you may waste your time and heart. If you can look beyond this past behaviour and realize he's a great guy, in spite of some past mistakes and you feel he's trustworthy, then you proceed..but very cautiously. Take your time getting to know him. Watch how he interacts with his female friends...that will tell you a lot about him. I wish you well and just go slooow. Take Care
A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (27 February 2006):
 At least he was honest enough to tell you about sleeping with his friends.
I would just go into the relationship with my eyes open, and take it from there, you cannot worry about what he did when he was not with you or you will ruin the relationship through lack of trust from the start.
Chill and enjoy his company.
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