A
female
age
30-35,
*ellybaby123
writes:Me and my boyfriend have had a gorgeous little boy 7 months ago,everythings going great,okay a few arguements but over silly things,our relationship with our son is great its just our relationship that seems to be going down hill.We havent had sex for 2months now and im getting really down about it,i fear that im not good enough for him anymore,that he doesnt see me in the same light,that im not pretty enough,i feel awful if im honest soo many things are going through my mind and i just need it putting to ease.Iv asked him for the first time tonight why and the reply i got was because he's tired then when i asked him again he says he doesnt no why?am i doing something wrong?what should i do.we all have needs im just worried that if he isnt getting them from me then where else might he be getting them from?and im obviously upset as now i dont think he finds me attractive enough to have sex with.I need advice :( Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 October 2011):
Then there's a very high chance that he may have been somewhat traumatized because of it. Some men find it very hard to have sex with their partners if they've been at a birth, because their child (putting it bluntly) came out the same way that he'd go in. Some men just find it hard to separate the whole sex and childbirth thing. I think your boyfriend is one of them.
I think now you're at a stage where you need to tell him straight that this is affecting you badly and you need things to change. You both need to go to the doctor or something and you both need to start working on this.
For what it's worth, this is absolutely not about you. This is all about his own state of mind. Tell him you're unhappy and tell him you need things to change and that you'll work with hi to change them. That may mean counselling, it may mean dressing up sexy and sending your lovely child away for the night or something like that.
Good luck with it all. And please don't let it get to you - this is his state of mind and it's not about you at all.
A
female
reader, Jellybaby123 +, writes (6 October 2011):
Jellybaby123 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes he was
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 October 2011):
Was he present at the birth?
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