A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf says he loves me and i feel that he does but when he gets angry at me he says a lot of hurtful things like "i found a better girl than you or i wish i would have never met you,your just a typical girl,i should of just used you", things like that but then after he cools down he says he is sorry and that he didnt mean anything. is this normal in a relationship?should i put up with it because im in love with him? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell whenever he says those things to me i just listen and dont tell him anything back.i dont insult him,i just wait until he is calm,but thanks for your advice and it did really help. i think i might have a talk with him and see if he changes.
A
female
reader, InLoveW/Love +, writes (4 August 2010):
Your boyfriend is trying to hurt you because he is hurting himself. How do you respond when he says such hurtful things? Do you say mean things back or do you just sit there and take it? You should never reciprocate his actions.
Talk to him and tell him to stop being so verbally abusive. Then lead by example. When you are in an argument with him and he starts to insult you firmly but calmly end contact with him until he calms down.
This could be a bad sign, something that he's picked up from a friend/family member. If it doesn't get better after your talk then end it. Your self-esteem will be ruined if you stay with a man that puts you down.
P.S.- My boyfriend was the same way, always insulting me when we got in fights. It isn't normal but it is common among insecure men. The only way it stopped was when i stopped doing what he was doing and told him how i felt. Now when we argue, we don't have to hurt each other in the process. :)
Hope this helped.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010): Hello!!
To be honest, i do not think you should put up with this guy. I kno wyou love him and it hurts but Mr. Right Guy would not do such things to you. Only you know how you feel when he says those things to you. He should think about your feelings at all times. That means that he has to learn to remain silent when he is angry.
Best wishes!! Take care and be happy!!
Smile! :P
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (4 August 2010):
 No thats not normal. If your boyfriend really loved you he would never say those things..Thats a thing called verbal abuse..if he cant control what he says to you, then you need to find yourself a bf who will.
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