A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have had the ultimate worst luck with men! From being in a serious relationship for 6 years, to being with another guy for 2 years who ended things with me cos his mother controlled his every breath and hated my guts for some reason :o@ Now I have met a guy.. who likes me way more than I like him. Everyone says a girl should be with someone who loves them more.. so do you think I should go for it, and be with this guy.. even though I don't like him as much, but I know he would treat me well? I'm not getting any younger.. and I do want to get married and settle down soon! Help me someone! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks so much for all your advice! It really helped.. I have decided to slowly get to know him, and for some strange reason.. I am beginning to like him bit by bit every day.. Thanks so much x x
A
female
reader, dearkelja  +, writes (1 January 2008):
 I agree with Phil. You should be head over heals in love with the man you choose to marry. This is what will get you through all the crap that is sure to come in marriage. If you settle you will always wonder if you chose wisely and you will most likely leave your marriage because you want more.
That's what I did. Was head over heals in love with a guy who dumped me so I settled for a man who loved me but I was not head over heals in love with him. I am divorced and the most unfair thing about this is that I was not fair to him. He deserved better.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): get to know him more and see if your likeing to him increases. if not stay as friends, there is no point for settling for less then your best x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2007): Don't get too desperate to get married or you'll inevitably end up with the wrong guy and divorce is sure to follow sooner or later.
Try not to see this guy as marriage material, more someone to experiment with. You may come to like him more, and at the same time, of course, he might decide he likes you less!
It's a bit of a lottery, this marriage business, but you'll never get to know someone properly, warts and all, until you've been with them for quite a while, and initial impressions are often wrong.
To my mind, before you marry someone you should both be absolutely head over heels in love and 100% certain that he or she is 'the one' - and have been together for at least a year before considering marriage.
You've got plenty of years left in you yet before you're past marrying age - whenever that might be - there was a couple in their 90's got married just before Chrismas!
Phil
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A
female
reader, nikkij +, writes (31 December 2007):
 Never settle...especially with someone who could be your future spouse.
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