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female
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*om_nickynoo
writes: my question is what do i do. I have a partner, we have been together for 2 years, i have a 3 month baby girl. I love him he means the world to me. The problem is that he lies to me. not as in cheating as i dont think he ever would. Its the day to day things that bothers me as i dont understand why. the 3 main lies i know about, as i have confronted him and his has admitted to 2 of them. the problem is that i know how far he goes with a lie he follows it through until he trips himself up. for example. 150 pounds that he was supposed to pay into my account, never arrived into it. he said it was the bank that must of made an error. I rang the bank on several occassions. after two weeks i confronted him and then he admitted that he never paid it in as he had to use the money for work travel. so he lied instead of approaching me . i just dont know where i stand, im going mad.
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female
reader, fairyangel  +, writes (8 December 2005):
 People who feel a constant need to lie to their partner in this way as you describe,are actually suffering from some type of damage done to their character,in their childhood. They usually have low self esteem and have a deep need for acceptance.Because of this feeling of unworthiness, they feel the need to lie to make themselves look better to others.If your partner can recognise where this is coming from, he can begin to move foward and realise he need not be a slave to how he was treated in his past, or while growing up.He can start working on his self worth and some counselling would help him with this.
He just needs love and acceptance for who he is, so try to understand this is not about wanting to hurt you, it is not directed at you personally at all. It is just a product of the way he feels about himself.Try to encourage him to seek that counselling soon as possible so you can move foward in your life together.Hope I have been able to give you some comfort and hope for the future, wishing you much happiness together, take care.
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