A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hello all i need a male perspective pls, i have been friends with a bloke for bout 6 years i always thawt he was amazing but he is in a relationship, so i never let on, about 2 years ago i found him looking at me alot and doing things that were sweet he was being very good to me well he always has been, he is apparently unhappy in his relationship, at first he would ask me to meet him and i didnt quite a few times then i did, i told him that he shouldnt call me anymore, we didnt sleep together for ages i tried to stop it but he kept coming back we get on amazing and he makes me feel safe, the problem is i would wait for him if he wanted me but he will go away for months or weeks with no contact, surely if he didnt care and just wanted sex he would of give up after the first few months of tryin and not getting it? what do u think im very nervous with men because of my past it took me along time to relax with him i cant figure it out x Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (19 December 2009):
It's not always about sex for men. But to be honest, yes I think this guy is using you.
He stays with his girlfriend but gets the urge for good feelings, cuddles and a bit of an ego boost, so every couple of months he comes to you.
If he liked you enough then he'd leave his girlfriend and look you up.
You say you have been hurt before so be tough with him. Next time he comes back and calls you or texts you reply with "Hello. Have you split up with your girlfriend yet?" Don't even ask him how he is or be polite.
If he says anything other than "Yes I'm single and want to take you out for dinner." then tell him to stop bothering you. Tell him you don't want to hear from him again unless he's single and looking for a relationship.
Then hang up. And if he calls back then let it go to voice mail.
A guy who likes you would be with you.
Good Luck!! xx
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