A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have been with my boyfriend for 8 years and love him very much but over the last year he has lied to me on 3 seperate occasions. They were not huge lies but involved sneaking around doing things behind my back he had promised not to do (eg drugs) each time i felt betrayed and hurt and each time he swore he would not lie to me about anything again. I am a very honest person and honsety and trust are a huge priority for me in a relationship. I do not want to end our relationship as it is so good in every other way but I cant see how to go on when I can not trust him? Last time he lied we worked very hard to rebuild trust and now he has destroyed that again, am i a fool to try again?
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2008): Very likely a bad decision to keep going in a relationship that includes mistrust. If his drug use is just smoking some grass (marijuana), it may not be so bad with some people, but anything else is very bad news. Be with someone compatible with your values and will make you happy.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 January 2008):
 Your b/f needs help if he has a drug problem.Sometimes, they are not in control . It is like a compulsive addictive behaviour.
You have two choices, accept him and his faults as no one can be perfect or leave him till he really changed and give up drugs.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2008): The definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again expecting different results...you have answered your own question.
If your boyfriend uses drugs, this ought to be a complete deal breaker, love doesn't have anything to do with it then, it is all about him and the drugs, that is who he is having a relationship with, not you.
Get out and stay out, 8 years is a waste of your heart and your love life, you deserve someone who has it together.
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