A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I was really close with this guy. We flirted and things but I didn't think he liked me as more than a friend because his actions and words didn't always match up. We got into a fight and he found out I lied to him. Ever since he's done and said some mean hurtful things. He said to never speak to him again, he goes out of his way to avoid me. He is even talking about me to friends and classmates and making me sound like a monster so they won't like me or want to talk to me. One girl that is his friend and barely knows me attacked me verbally calling me ugly and acted as if she knew all about what happened between me and him. I had another girl say yeah, he told me some interesting things about you. I feel I've done everything I can to make amends. I apologized, I told him why I lied, and was honest about the situation. I even gave him some space. The first time I tried talking to him though he basically yelled at me in front of other ppl and cussed me out. Ever since I've been nervous to talk to him for fear he'd embarrass me again. I see now he has a temper but he is also part of the popular, cool clique and I'm not sure what to do! I'm very upset and have been crying about it almost everyday.
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female
reader, BW123 +, writes (19 August 2012):
Sounds like he's being pretty immature. Unfortunately, this is how people act in high school and unfortunately, some people never seem to grow out of this type of behavior no matter how old they are.
My advice to you is to view this as an opportunity to prove just how mature you are. This will be a good learning experience for you because it will happen to you repeatedly throughout your life.
What I do is I focus on my friendships that are constructive, not destructive. Ignore the people who lash out at you, it's none of their business anyway. Instead, give your time and energy to friends that you can trust and do activities together that will be good for you in the long run, like sports/fitness, school, art, work, etc... You're young and you have many years to go before you really need to worry about relationships with guys.
Good luck dealing with this. These people aren't worth your time. Rise above, they are beneath you. Hold your head high. If you can look at yourself in the mirror and be happy with who you are, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
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