A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi i've been seeing this guy for a few months for sex after our short relationship ended because I'm moving away soon and he dosnt want to get hurt when I leave. At first I wasn't keen on him but the sex was good so it continued and now I have fallen for him. I've never been in love before so I don't know if I love him but I think about him all the time, I always want one of his cuddles, he makes me laugh and I feel safe when I am with him. I end up comparing every guy to him because he seems so perfect. I havnt told him how I feel and was wondering if you think I should? I see him just for sex and we never go out, I've suggested it a few times but he always says he hasn't got the time or money. The last few times I've seen him I end up feeling used and dirty because I don't hear from him for weeks but I still go back because I care about him and I want him to be happy even if I'm not. Part of me wants to tell him but I'm scared incase he dosnt like me like that and he might never want to see me again. I'm not sure what would hurt more! Any advice would be much appreciated :-)
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (20 November 2010):
 You already know he does not like you "like that " ! He never find the time or money to go out with you, he only wants you for sex- and not that often, too, since you don't hear from him for weeks.
Getting involved in FWBs is always risky and unwise as you have seen. Yours is also a transitional relationship, since you are moving soon.
What do you think you'd accomplish by telling him your love ? Do you think you'd get a status upgrade to girlfriend ? - Think again.
Don't say anything. If you still get out some gratification from this situation, go with the flow and enjoy it while it lasts- if you don't , and the heartbreak is more than the pleasure, finish it right now.
A
female
reader, Adorskable  +, writes (20 November 2010):
 Sorry to tell you this but I think your friend is not into you and only wants the benefits of sex. The best thing you can do is let him know how you feel and see what his response is and go from there.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2010): This FWB thing is not a good idea and you've found out the hard way i'm afraid. I don't think this guy wants a relationship and those pathetic excuses for not going out anywhere don't wash with me.
The thing is you both knew at the start that this was just about sex and guys have the ability to not get attached but girls usually do when it comes to sex.
I think you're going to have to stop the sex because it's just going to make you feel worse. Trust me i've been there and this won't turn into a relationship.
You're going to have to explain to him that if you can't have a real relationship then you will no longer have sex with him because it hurts you. If he doesn't understand that then it's best to move on.
Feel free to message me. x
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