A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid. I need help. Okay here goes. I started going with this guy, and we've been together for 6 months now. He's married and is in the process of a divorce. He and his wife are no longer living together. He wants us to get a place together.At one point and time he returned to his wife, and tried and make it work, and it didnt. So I waited patiently to see where his head was. She has since moved out of the state. I'm 10 years older than him. He has no children. I have my tubes tied; He wants children. At one time he was telling me that he loves me, but me not being able to give him a child is a deep concern of his. He also would constantly talk to me about being his wife. His ex-wife cheated on him and got pregnant by someone else. I have proved to him numerous times that I love him, and would never do any thing to hurt him. I want to move in with him, and I also take my relationships serious.Now he says he's been doing a lot of thinking but he wont say about what. I know he loves me, but he's denying it. How can I get him to realize that theres other options to having children. I have discussed it with him, but he wont open up to me. At one point he's telling me how much of a good woman I am, and at other times he's just quiet. I feel that if I move in with him, he'll fall head over heals in love with me. But I could also be wrong. Please help.....!!!!
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divorce, ex-wife, his ex, moved out, want children Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou're right, you notice I said a few days, meaning 2 or 3 days. I surly dont want to lose him...
A
female
reader, nailglitter18  +, writes (29 January 2008):
 Don't play too hard to get, cos you might just lose him. good luck. :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm giving him a test to see just where his head is. It might sound silly, but I'm gonna give him some space, and not call him for a few days and see what he has to say when he calls me. I have done this before and the results were good. When he called me I had a "nonchalaunt" attitude, I think I spelled it wrong, but when he called I was distant, and he asked why I was I being that way and that I should have been happy to hear from him. My response to that was, yes I'm happy to hear from you, but I am giving you time to clear up you issues. Anyways I'm going to start going places and not waiting on his call, and when the time is right and we talk I'm going to be so-called busy. To let him realize that I was putting myself on hold for him. Do you think it's the right thing to do..?
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A
female
reader, nailglitter18 +, writes (29 January 2008):
I would say give it a try- because it's worth it, at the end of the day. When he's ready, he'll talk. But he needs to realize that communication is key in cases like this. There are many options out there, you're right! Something like this doesn't have to mean the end of a relationship. Just make sure that you are BOTH happy in this situation.
Can you get your tubes "untied"?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2008): Ok let me start of by saying i am only 18, so don't take what i say with 100% certainty.
Ok i haven't had experience with this type of stuff, but no one else is answering so ill give it a shot.
Ok I think the man is confused about the fact if he stays with you he will never have a 'Complete Family' with kids, grandkids etc. and to some people this is really important. I have learned this from my parents and other relationships i have seen but if you are uncertain if he loves you, don't move in together. It really is silly to think because you move in together he will love you more.
Anyway good luck with the relationship.
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