A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend, Danny hates my twin-sister.Basically our boyfriends, Danny and Lee were friends before my sister and I started to go out with them. Now my boyfriend Danny hates the fact that Lee and my sister are together, and is very jelouse that Lee's away from him and with my sister.He now is very nasty and spiteful towards my sister, causing bad feeling, uneasyness and the whole thing is horrible for me.Needless to say now Lee and my sister wont speak to Danny which is a big problem as we used to hang out loads with them, now a lot of our joint friends have started to stop speaking with Danny which means we're losing friends. Danny wont see how bad this all is and keeps saying its lee and my sisters fault but its not its him, and its really upsetting me, we hardly ever go to see my family because he doesnt want to see them. He wont listen to me and change his ways and its causing rows. HELP!!!! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2007): Yikes!! You have a dysfunctional, very immature,controlling bf there. He has put himself in a precarious position here and I sure hope you tell him,
"Danny, this is my sister. We love each other very much and you are trying to control and disrespect all that is important to me...my family and my life. Forcing me to do this, tells me you are an egotisical, toxic, dysfunctional guy and I have become enlightened to that fact. It's time for us to end this relationship."
You will never regret doing this. You may feel sad for awhile at the loss but you really have 'nothing of substance' to lose. He's not a good guy. A nice man who respects you would do anything to gain the respect of your family. Danny feels entitled to being this way and he blames everyone else for his poor, self-serving,uncaring actions. He doesn't know how to to take responsibility for his behaviours. Your sister and you are family and there is nothing more precious. Danny may be only in your life for a short time. She will be there for a lifetime. Long after the guys like Danny are gone, she will be there for you when you marry, you both careers and have family and you both grow old together. Your lives will be forever intertwined. Family is a gift. Don't allow a cad like Danny to threaten the family bond and kinship you share with your sister. Be strong dear..you are young..use your head and realize Danny came into your life, for a reason, to teach you "who' not to date in your future. Good luck, my dear and I sure hope that you see what this guy is doing is very,very wrong. Don't tolerate it.
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