A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello all,I have a question about a guy Ive recently started dating (about a month or so). He seemed to be really interested the first few dates and still does seem to have interest in getting together but had cancelled the last 2 dates. He has a very unpredictable and hectic work schedule which I understand as I used to work in the same industry. However, my problem is I feel he is not respecting my time. The first time, he got in touch with me a few hours before we were supposed to meet to tell me he would not be able to make it out of work till late that night, and asked if I was free to do something over that weekend instead. I wasn't so we decided do try again for the next week. The next week came around and he asked me out but when the day came, he didn't get in touch with me all day. So I contacted him asking if we were still on at which point he said he wasn't going to be able to get out on time again, asking if we could reschedule again, which we did. Now we are supposed to meet up in a few days and I am really expecting him to cancel again. I feel like I missed my chance to say something the last time because it was really rude of him to not even let me know until I contacted him, especially since he initiated the date...but now I'm not sure how to act. We have yet to figure out a time/place for our next date, but if he doesn't call me, should I get in touch with him? (I don't really want to). Also, if he does end up cancelling, how can I make it clear to him that this is not ok? Thanks in advance! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the replies. I think you're all pretty right...he hasn't gotten in touch with me yet and we're supposed to meet in two days, so if he doesn't call me, Ill have my answer.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2010): To put it bluntly - if a guy really wants to see you he will find a way.
Sounds like he's just not that in to you....
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (4 April 2010):
Tell him that it's not acceptable. That's all you have to do. Tell him straight that you resent that he's cancelling. If he goes on to make an effort, then all well and good. If not, end it and find a guy who will put effort in.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 If he does not call, you are not his priority but only an option. Leave him be. Calling him would make you sound clingy.
If it is canceled again , just accept that he is forever too busy and have no time for you . Walk away and tell him "Asta la Vista babe! "
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 If he doesn't call you, don't call him back. It's his loss.
If he does call and cancel at the last minute, tell him, "I understand that you have a busy schedule, but I would appreciate if you gave me at least an hour's notice the next time you have to cancel." Leave it at that. You haven't dated long enough to give him the business.
Good luck.
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