A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:hi, I am so depressed at the moment, heres the story. I know its a bit boring but bare with me.. I've been going out with my partner for 2.5 years and we have been living together for about 6 months now.We've alway been a fiery couple but deep down we love each other. 2 weeks ago I had a huge row with him and I threw him out. He is addicted to using the internet and could spend up to 10 hours on a weekend a day on it. I feel like I can't get any attention off him. I have told him all this but thigs haven't changed..Any way the row, this anger had been building up over this and i threw him out.. I regretted it the next day and I begged him to come back. we took a break for 1 week and he came back on Friday night. We sat down Saturday morning to discuss things. he said he likes to unwind with the internet so I just said if he just pays me some attention and spend some quality time with me i'll ease up nagging him about the internet.So its been 5 days since he's come back and he has spent all his time on the net and none with me. I have said nothing but now I just don't know where to go from here. Will he change should I say something again about it.. I don't know what to do... Please helpThanks LP.S he just plays that party poker on the net (no money involved) but he seems addicted to it...
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male
reader, bird  +, writes (2 April 2008):
well i cant tell u to leave him because i know how it feel to try to live without the person u love. but 1 thing i tell u if ur not happy and u think this is going to happend the rest of the time ur with him ,i think u sould move on because u think ur happy but i can tell ur not its ur choise what ever u chose just think AM I GOING TO BE HAPPY LIKE THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (2 April 2008):
Party poker, or any type of little game like that can be very addictive.
But if you roll over now then you will have basically told him that it's fine for him to carry on.
You need to stop nagging and shouting at him though as you have already discovered that it doesn't work. Instead, move things on.
Next time he has a day off, plan with him, in advance something exciting to do. We will go out to have dinner in a nice cocktail bar / go to a theme park / go to a film / go for a walk by the river. We will do this at 3 o clock. Book things if necessary. Set an alarm clock to go off when he needs to start getting ready.
Then you go off and go shopping with friends or do some gardening and get ready in your own time. Make yourself really gorgeous so he remembers what he's been missing out on.
This way he has time to fanny about online and you will get time with him. Build it up week by week, so he spends more time with his amazing girl and less time with the computer.
Of course he might let you down and if he does, then you need to take action. How much action is up to you. Is this worth ending the relationship over? Is the relationship worth saving? You could just get some pliers out of the tool box and cut the plugs off the computer?
Good Luck xx
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A
female
reader, allenrobin +, writes (2 April 2008):
 Well you can have two choices here. You can get on a computer and play with him. Encourage him to play games with you online, or You can get dressed up to the nines everyother day and go find something fun to do yourself and make him worry about what your doing and even if its just for curiositys' sake he will start noticing and spend more time with you.But........ If you want to make him understand with a little humor you could dismantle a keyboard (not his) and attach keys of interest such as the "Enter", "Shift", "Insert" and other various keys to interesting places on your body. Then tell him if thats what it takes it's just for him.He will get the message and you willmake your point.... trust me my husband did!
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