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He helps me financially but I'm the one who always initiates our conversations. Is he at all interested in me?

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Question - (2 August 2017) 4 Answers - (Newest, 2 August 2017)
A female United States age 30-35, *eautifulParadise writes:

So I have this friend that iv had for a while now.

We've actually just met once and hooked up and then he went off overseas for a job.

Well, we stayed in contact and have talked on and off.

I just had a son and have gone through a tough time financially. He has helped me a lot, buying me food, getting me my son's car seat and other things for him. He never ask anything of me and even though I talked to him about other guys from my past, he was always there for me.

The thing is, recently I have been initiating the conversation all the time it seems and I stopped to see if he would message me first and NOTHING for three days. Now I'm thinking maybe I was bothering him. He has said before that he likes me but what if he was just doing stuff for me because he felt pity or something. One time I asked him and he said it was because he likes to do nice things for people.

I have tried to hint at us dating but all he said back in June was that we would in August.

But he still hasn't mentioned it again.

His job requires him to move around a lot, he is an Air Marshal, so I understand that he would be hesitant but I really want to be with him and I thought the whole helping me out all the time meant that he wanted to.

Now I don't know what to do. I don't want to screw things up but him not texting me at all these couple of days makes it seem like he was just talking to me because I was initiating it.

What should I do?

Thanks!

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A male reader, Riot2017 Mexico +, writes (2 August 2017):

Please don't stop communication with him.

You see, being in the air force is a tough job, and more if you have to travel a lot. If a guy does not initiate conversation under this conditions, it's likely that it's very busy, or does not want to bother you, or thinks that you might be busy.

I honestly can't tell if this guy likes you, but it's likely that he does, but may be he is not in a position for starting something more serious with you due to his constant traveling.

I personally like to do nice things to people, regardless of gender or age. But for the person I like, I try to go further with my presents and gifts.

Best luck!

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A female reader, Dionee' South Africa +, writes (2 August 2017):

Dionee' agony auntGive the guy a break OP. Don't keep leaving him text message after text message. Give him some space and see how it goes.

Perhaps he's not where he though he would be or things haven't worked out like he thought that they would by now you know?

I say, wait for him to contact you and take it from there.

Maybe once he contacts you when he can, then the two of you can see where it goes?

Don't psych yourself out. There is still time and things could still go your way. Just... take it easy.

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A female reader, LionWisdom United States +, writes (2 August 2017):

Certain individuals who are well off do not mind helping others in need.

I believe he just wanted to help out of the goodness of his heart.

I do not see that he wants to date you. With the job he has, I do not think he would have the time for a relationship.

Thank him for his kindness, and look for someone who is more on your level.

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A male reader, judgedick France +, writes (2 August 2017):

judgedick agony auntYou need to give him time, He has put work first for now and not able to be around all the time, 3 days is not long,

but you could do with asking him to eat withyou some evening soon when he is off work and see what comes out of it.

even acornes need a lettel help to grow, he likes you and knows your history, but it is not said in your post how free he is,

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