A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My partner has slept with over 100 women before he met me, most of them unprotected. I think he must have children somewhere but he claims he doesn't. How can he possibly know this? I know this is a bit crazy and they'd never be able to find him anyway but what does everyone think? Can you go round for 10 years and have unprotected sex with strangers and not one of them get pregnant?p.s. he has been checked for STD's and knows about the one he has, so we're very careful.
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male
reader, SanDiegoGuy  +, writes (7 March 2010):
I’m replying to this to share, not to brag. Some men do increase their “numbers” but it’s usually a turn-off to women, not a turn-on. Men don’t realize that and think big numbers impress their partner as they seem to “have more experience.”
I have slept with about 250 women. Most of these women were in my 20’s and 30’s as a single man. 99% of them were unprotected sex, but I always made sure there was female birth control; pill, IUD, sponge, diaphragm of the “timing.” Four of the women had abortions, and none of the others had children.
Now, this was in the 1980’s before the large spread of HIV and other STI’s that are more prevalent and viral as today. And today, I do not have unprotected sex like I did then.
During that time, I may have slept with 3 different women in the same day (24 hour period). One that spent the night, one at lunch or early evening, and another that I had join me late at night (booty call). I had an immense sexual appetite and could never get enough it seemed. I also had an amazingly short refractory period and it wasn’t uncommon for me to have 8 or more orgasms a night.
I had some benefits to which I attribute the women being attracted and returning for sexual encounters. I was gifted being well endowed, 7 inches and a very large girth of 6 inches and circumcised. I am 6’0” tall and weighed 175. I was somewhat muscular, but not a body builder. I am fairly handsome, but not a movie star or model. However, I was handsome enough to attract over 250 women.
Of those, about 90% slept with me on the first date or meeting. I became very good at seduction. Also, some may have been drinking, but I never took advantage of a drunk woman, and I never pushed ahead against their will. It was always consensual sex. Frequently, about 25% of the time, the women initiated the sexual advances.
There were a couple of years, when I was 25 and 26, where I slept with over 20 new women each year. There were several women that I regularly slept with, as if we were a couple, for several years. For a period of 3 to 4 years I slept with the same 6 women. Some women I slept with for over 5 years, while I dated other women with their knowledge.
So there were several regular, constant sex partners over several years along with new sex partners during that time. Many I would meet at bars and dance clubs or through parties. Several were introduced to me by my other girlfriends (sexual partners).
When I was 17-19, I slept with about 10 girls aged 15. 5 of them were friends of each other, and it was my first experience with a two-some, with 2 15 year olds. I had about 5 two-somes during my sexual career, all two females and me.
Sometimes I slept with women 10 years older, like a 35 year old when I was 25. Today they call them “cougars.” I called them mature and experienced. They were also more open to me seeing other people.
Now how does a man sleep with that many women? The short answer is money. Also having the time. I was an early business success at age 22 and had a nice new sports car, my own well furnished home and a nice wardrobe. I would take the women out to nice restaurants and buy nice meals and champagne.
I wasn’t trying to “buy” their affection, it just seemed to work that way. I was a gentlemen and always paid for everything. Always picked them up on time, always opened their door, always was polite and never used profanity. I would bring them home and maybe light the fireplace and turn on some soft music. Sometimes we would go in my hot tub or sometimes we just talked for hours.
Eventually we would kiss and that led to heavy petting and then to the bedroom for sex. It was never manipulative and most of the women would see me again. So even though I almost always had sex the first night, I did not have a lot of “one night stand” type relationships. Most women returned to have sex from a low of 3 to as much as 100 times after meeting.
So the end of my story is that yes, a man cans sleep with that many women, as I did before I was 35. And yes he can be sleeping with several at the same time. One weekend I met a woman on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and the holiday Monday and slept with all 4 that weekend. And then I continued to sleep with those 4 for a few months and one of them for over 4 years.
I only caught and STI once, and I stopped seeing that woman. I do not have a vasectomy, but it is possible I have a low sperm count. I have never had children.
I never slept with a prostitute, although some women behaved like it. I have slept with about 10 married women that I know of, perhaps dozens of women that were dating other men. I know for certain that women will cheat on their partners if they find someone interesting or an opportunity is irresistible.
A
female
reader, CC620 +, writes (14 September 2006):
Why in the world would you date a guy thats been with so many women anyway????????????? whether he has children or not is far less important than if he has HIV...... Dont ya think??????????
-Chris
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2006): I posted the possible numbers in response to someone inferring that it was improbable.
All the more reason to double bag it!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2006): It really doesn't matter how many strangers he slept with unprotected. It only takes one time. All the averages and figures in the world mean nothing. YES, he could be a father and not know it. So what? So could I. So could a large number of men.I don't think that's the real issue here. What you need to do is ask yourself why it bothers you so much. If you do that, you'll probably get to the root of the real reason you're posting here and what's really wrong in your relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2006): Well lets see...
When did he become sexually active?
Lets say 17.
Lets say he slept with a girl every month...that's 12 in a year. Lets say he did this for three years.
That would be 36.
Do we want to do the lets say it was a different girl every week for a year? That would be 48 to 54 depending on the year and if it is a leap year.
Lets say that when he was older, he started having one night stand over the weekend after meeting them in bars/clubs. Lets say it was a different girl every night.
That's 3 for every four weeks which would make it a montly total of 12. So that is 144 women a year.
It is quite possible that people can sleep with that many people especially when alcohol is introduce; it tends to loosen people's morals/standards as it is an inhibitor.
Scary to contemplate.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2006): Possibly infertile?
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female
reader, bonym +, writes (8 September 2006):
 Its amazing how small numbers can somehow mysteriously transform into 3 digit figures, like Irish49 said, I bet this figure is not even accurate. Saying you have slept with 100 women seems to be the standard number for most men but its just based on pure averages. I dont know how old your man is but I heard a guy one say and he is 46 that he has slept with around 100 women since losing his v plates at 17. He said if on average he slept with 3 girls per year over 29 years that would equate to 87 and he says that maybe in a year he slept with less, other years more etc, but depending on how old he is, I am not necessarily sure its true as it is purely guess work. If he has slept with 100 women over 10 years that equates to 10 per year on average and maybe thats true, maybe its a lie. If he has slept with a lot of women unprotected it is likely he has fathered children somewhere, so he has no real way of knowing if he is a father or not. Either way, please be careful and ensure he is STD free. Take care. xXx
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2006): When did he tell you that number, before or after he was intimate with you?
He could just be estimating the number as he was probably like most young men and women of today; going to bars and getting drunk and having one night stands.
It could be that he feels it was that irresponsible that he could have been with countless women.
About the pregnancy thing; it is possible and probable that he has a child somewhere due to the fact he had unportected sex numerous times with numerous women who may not have been on the pill.
Is it worth worrying about something such as this? Why are you stuck on wondering if he has a child or not; what does this do to you?
What is the real concern?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2006): It's possible that he doesn't have any children but he isn't really in any position to know this. How would he?
You say they will never be able to find him. I'm not so sure? In 20 years time when these children are adults I'm sure it will be quite possible to trace your biological parents using DNA much easier than it is now.
I also agree with Irish though - he could have made this number up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2006): It's quite possible he was just a very, very lucky man, hun. But quite frankly dear..I knew a guy once (didn't date him), who told me he slept with hundreds of ladies. I honestly thought he was full of bullcrap. I was right..it finally came out, he slept with 11 women, not hundreds. Are you sure he's telling you the truth and why is he even 'quoting' a number? I question a man's maturity and sincerity when his self-esteem is so low and his ego, so large that he has to quote numbers to his gf. Don't you wonder why he's doing this? He's could be playing the 'jealousy' game with you. Just make sure he is clean and continue practising safe sex whether or not he wants to do it, unprotected or not. In other words...look after yourself. Good luck!
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