A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am in a troubled relationship. I am 27 years old and my boyfirend of 3 years is 42. Everything was great in the beginning of our relationship, but now as time goes on he is getting more jealous, i cannot talk to men i can only hang out with 2 girlfriends, i cant go to the bar or anything for a girls night out without have reprocutions about it. But when it comes to him he seems to be allowed to do what ever he feels he wants to do.If we decide to go out one night there are always problems started. Every time i always do something wrong in his mind. But what he does not realize it is him that is doing wrong and i get the blame for it cause he dont want me doing the same thing.This last time we went out had drawn the line with me, a week before i threw a b-day party for my man some girl came here that i did not know and she was flirting with my man. I went downstaris and seen the groin to groin laughing and whatever else i told the girl to leave and told my man that this was totally uncalled for. All what he could say to me is that he wont sleep with her a second time!!! But if i were to do this i would be in trouble for a long long time and he would never trust me. I let this go so there would be no more fighting. One week later we decided to go out again i knew it was gonna be bad but i did it anyhow. I thought we were having a good night but when we left the last place as soon as we got in the car he got really upset with me saying i dont let him talk to nobody and it embarrases him. When i asked what he was talking about he mentioned that girl again. I guess she was there and he was upset that he could not go talk to her. Now we are in a huge fight over it, and i dont know what to do about it.I dont drink very often and he is every night drinker. He has many good nights but the odd time he drinks too much.How can i get my man to understand that it is him doing the wrong not me? How do i get him to see that him doing that with that girl was wrong and if i were to do it, there would be problems?I admit that i went crazy on that girl and i did knock her out but then the next day my man told her he would do all her work for free for her just so she would not be mad any more. This is very hurtful and i dont know who to deal with it. I do not want to loose him for i feel that he is my soul mate and i love him ever so much. I need help with showing him that i am a good girl but he cant do what he does cause that is what makes me angry. (contradicting himself all the time)Please help!!!!!
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flirt, jealous, soulmate Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (28 November 2009):
 Soul mate...
I don't think this means what you think it means.
A
male
reader, mr motivator  +, writes (28 November 2009):
Its called double standards, and its something that you either comply to, and spend the rest of your life under his thumb and his rule, or you stand up for yourself say what you want and if he cant accomodate it you go and find someone who can (theres plenty of people out there)
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