A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years, and he has a 2 year old daughter to another woman.He has her every weekend, and the weekend is the only time we spend any time together so we never really get any time to ourselves. this doesn't seem to bother him but is really taking a toll for me. whenever i try to talk to him about it he thinks i am attacking his daughter and gets mad and wont talk about it, when all i want is some understanding that its a hard situation for me...we want to move out together but i dont know now if its a good choice, i will be working mon - fri, he is still at university and every weekend his daughter will be over at our house.does this situation get easier? over the 2 years it just feels like its getting harder, probably because i dont get to talk to him about it. if i try he will say "yeah well she is my daughter and she isnt going anywhere" but i never mentioned anything about that! all i want is to vent to him that its hard, especially because i am only 20, and on top of that he doesnt want me going out or drinking at all.this weekend i have 3 friends birthdays on saturday night and i know he wont let me go because he will have his daughter! i dont know what to do :-(
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 March 2010):
This is the price of taking on a guy who has a child. When push comes to shove, his daughter will come first. All the time. Every time.
Move on now, and pick a guy who doesn't have a child already.
A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (10 March 2010):
 I am afraid that you will be vying for attention with the daughter for the rest of your relationship so it wont get any better. And so sadly your relationship has run its course.Yes children are wonderful as long as they are yours. when you date someone with kids its is very difficult. I personally don't date women with kids for this reason,that generally other peoples kids are a nuisance at best and put a damper on the relationship.Get a new BF....ONE WITH NO KIDS. You are too young to have to play second fiddle to a crumb snatcher
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (10 March 2010):
My advice is break up with him. Dating a partner with children is not for everybody. What would you rather have him do? See his 2 year old daughter less? It does get worse as she will be there needing his attention for the rest of his life. If you can't learn to love her then you are better of getting a single guy without any kids.
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