A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello,I am so confused about a relatonship that I recently got into. I met a guy on an online dating site in September. I was really taken with him he swept me off my feet and was so romantic we spent about three days a week together and we started making plans to live together. The thing is he just graduated school and he was dilgently looking for a job and he was orginally from out of state. He said that he could not find a job and he was running out of money so he had to look to employment in another location. He moved to another city about 2 hours away. I have pretty busy life where I live so I made it a point to see him every weekend. I drove to his apartment. We worked out a compromise for gas he would pay for half of my gas bill and he would pay for all the food entertainiment expenses when I got there. Everything seemed to be fine for the first couple of week, but then he kept comlaining he did not have enough money to go out to resturants. We compromised that we would eat in. We had a few small fights about little things that kinda blew up..and in the heat of the moment he said this relationship isnt going to work out. I cried and I said if this relationship isnt going to work out then I am not wasting any more of my time driving here to see yo and I got my bag and headed out the door. He told me to sit down and we would talk about it. So we did.. and we seemed to work through it.The thing is things seem to change between us ever since that night.. he doesnt call me as often and he does not seem excited to see me anymore... So I figured even though I care about him I should end it and let him out. So I sent him and email that I really diid not feel like he was interested in me anymore and that I could not do long distance and that i was sorry and I put I hope we can still be friends. He called me and asked me if I really did nt want to see him next weekend and I said I did but I really felt that his passion for me was gone. He said that because of the circumstances ( long distance) that maybe we should back off a little and take pressure off of ourselves form the relationship, he still invited me up for dinner adn a movie this weekend. I AM SO CONFUSED!!!! It seems to me that he gives me mixed signals. I tried to get out of this relationship, but I can' ttell if he still has feelings for me or wants to end it. He had a way out he did not end it.... I feel that i have stroong feelings for him that could be love one day.. I dont want to say goodbye, but I dont want tohang on toa lifeless relatonship either. PLEASE HELP ME MAKE THE RIGHT DESCISION.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk now I am still confused .I got two seperate responses. How is that suppose to help me!
A
female
reader, honeybabe +, writes (25 January 2011):
hi! You may be over analytical about your situation.. Relax.. He needs understanding from you. He does not want to lose you and at the same time he is pressured being with you and the situation..he is serious. its just the pressure that is eating him up. if you are the woman just support him and be strong with him.just dont give up.there are more problems to face when you are already married. Chill out! be a strong woman no whining please. Guys hates whining women!
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A
male
reader, GRW +, writes (25 January 2011):
You should break it off. He has no intention of this being a lasting relationship and just wants to use you for your weekend visits for as long as possible. If you two are meant to be together, you will find each other again. It is not going to work if you two live 2 hours away, unless one of you has plans to move back. And if you both really love each other, you'll will do everything in your power to be together.
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