A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am at a total loss. I am a 35 year old female and my boyfriend is 45 years old.We've been together 7 months. Right now we are living across the state from each other although.we do get to see each other every 2 weeks. We met on Facebook almost 2 years ago and I really didn't talk to him at first because I had the impression he ess 'trolling'. After about a year, I did start talking to him and hid sense of humor,compassion and "sincerity won me over. Looks like I got a little more honesty than I bargained for....he started getting drunk and would ONLY talk about his ex!!!!! Good, bad, in general terms, he just constantly feels the need to bring her name up!!!! When I call this to his attention, he says that "no one understands him including me". THEN....he adds 10-20 different women to his FB page everydsy KNOWING how much it upsets me!!!!! He says it's a HABIT he acquired after they split up and REFUSES to stop no matter what!!!! He even got really mean last week, totally unprovoked, and said he was going on FB to find someone else!!!! If I didn't love the S.O.B so much, this would be a no-brainer...I really need some help
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 September 2014):
 OH honey, I know you love him and I know you won't leave him but there are so many red flags here.
he gets drunk regularly. the man has an alcohol problem. YOU DO NOT WANT TO GET INVOLVED WITH AN ALCOHOLIC OR ADDICT. Once you get tangled in that web, life goes to hell in an hand-basket
he is not over his ex
he behaves immaturely
he mistreats you.
you can't fix him. gather your nerve and your strength and try to leave.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 September 2014):
 I agree with Tisha.
I don't see him returning your feelings at all or even having any regards for your feelings. You are a convenient 2 a week roll in the hay and conversations when he is lonely.
Even if you DO CARE for him and think you love him, it still IS a no-brainer.
The guy treats you like you don't really matter, play playground games (like adding women just to make you upset), he constantly talks about his ex (you know what that usually means, right? It means SHE is constantly on his mind and he isn't OVER her.) Which makes you.... the rebound.
What exactly are you getting out of this... relationship? Is it worth it? Emotionally?
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (11 September 2014):
 I would take a one-month detox break from this S.O.B. for a month. See how that goes. Based on the visit schedule you listed, it would only be 2 missed visits.
You've been with him for 7 months, x 2 that is 14 visits.
Two years minus 7 months is 17 months. You interacted with him for 17 months online, initially thought he was a troll, then he continued that troll behavior. Adding 20 women on FB everyday. He must be up to about 10,000 random FB female friend adds. Why are you even sticking around for this? You've met up with him less than 20 times and you say you love him? You don't know him! Oh dear.
If you love this person then I suggest you turn to your friends and family and those who love you for support when the inevitable break arrives.
Time to prepare for the breakup.
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