A
female
age
30-35,
*ennibug
writes:There was this guy back in highschool, who I really liked. But I knew that we'd never be together because he didn't see me that way, if you know what I mean. He was really interested in a friend of mine, and even when she told him she wasn't interested he never gave up hope. His best friend asked me to a dance, and I guess I was just amazed that even though the guy I really liked didn't see me that way his friend did. I did my best to forget him, and focus on his best friend. And I went out with the best friend for a little over a year. I broke up with him about a year ago. Since then I've been in one really short relationship that ended this January.I recently met back up with the guy I originaly liked, we started hanging out and we've been on a couple dates, he held my hand and told me that he liked me. I realized that I had never stopped liking him. Life was great for a couple days, but about two weeks ago we were hanging out with a couple friends and he was holding my hand(under a blanket) and my ex boyfriend was there. My ex-boyfriend, his bestfriend, kinda blew up and had a fit, because he still likes me. My ex told me that it's unforgivable for a friend to go out with the ex of their friend. But since then he's calmed down, and as far as I know he is still friends with the guy I like, and he is still takling to me.The problem is that the guy I like told me that night that he thought we should stop. I talked to him the next day and told him that I really wanted to be with him. He said he needed time. Now he hasn't said more than three words to me in two weeks, when before I talked to him every other day almost. Was it something I did? Is there any hope? What do I do now? Help me please...
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (5 May 2010):
 If you love him, you will need to let him go and if he comes back for you ,then he is yours.Otherwise , he is somebody's .
To some men , you are a second hand shoe or an old shoe and they would not want to try it on. Some men have this notion when they think of their best friend's ex.
If he is into you ,there will be no problems.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (5 May 2010):
Like another poster said, "bros before hos." Not implying you're a ho, but honestly, if your bestfriend started dating one of your exboyfriends REGARDLESS if you cared or not about him anymore, you'd probably be at least a little annoyed. Even among women (most women anyway), we know not to take our friend's sloppy seconds. You didn't do anything necessarily, but just like guys come-and-go, girls come-and-go to guys, but you always have your friends. And believe it or not, guys talk too. So their group of friends probably won't think very highly of you.
I know you originally liked this guy, but it sounds like you started dating his friend just to have someone there and now that the guy you did like is paying attention to you you're willing to take him. I don't think it's worth ruining their relationship over and you should take the high road and take it as a lesson learned. You're still so young and there's millions of guys out there.
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A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (4 May 2010):
 Guys have this special bond and believe it or not they have rules and one of them is not to be with a homies girl. You might not be with him anymore but just because were with him at some point makes you off limits.
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A
female
reader, kaiti30 +, writes (4 May 2010):
 You didnt do anything, its normal for a guy to do that, its the saying "bros before hoes" not saying your hoe of course. but its kinda the only way i can help u understand, guys form packs and sometimes they dont care if something ruins it, but if its his bestfriend? id do the same... but your ex needs to relies hes not with you anymore, and you moved on, just like he should do, if i was in your position, id talk to your ex and just say "look we had fun, but i dont like you anymore, and you really need to try and do the same, and that means not ruining my relationship." then just make the guy you originally liked talk to you, go up to him and say "this isnt something we can ignore, we nee dot talk about it sometime" he should come through... hope i helped! GOOD LUCK HUN!
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