A
female
age
30-35,
*.Girl
writes: Boys are sometimes very hard to understand, especially my last bf. I am usually a pretty good reader of people but i could never read him. For instance, i couldn't tell if he was flirting or not, or if he was nervous. But the thing is, some months into our relationship, he dumps me, and gives a pathetic reason, which doesn't matter, because later i find out the REAL reason. This was because i liked him too much and he wants a real relationship. As much as this hurts, i can't seem to get over him. This may probably be because i feel sorry for myself. I was very close to falling in love with him, and afraid i did something wrong. How can i be a good gf?
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female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (6 September 2008):
Wait, I thought a real relationship was where two people like/love each other for real!
I don't think the problem was that you "liked him too much and he wanted a real relationship" the problem was that he didn't like you enough and he wanted you to put out but you didn't.
You haven't given much information about yourself and how you acted with your boyfriend, but I tend to judge someone with they way they write. Your writting style shows more maturity and your choice of words show that you're a good person.
The best way to be a good person is to treat the person on how you will want them to treat you. This also applies to relationships. You wouldn't like it if your boyfriend got jelous of anything, for example,right? So trust your boyfriend and don't ram him against the wall. Also, communication is a big part of a relationship. If you have a problem with your boyfriend or if you're fighting, take time to calm and discuss in a civilized way the reasons for fighting.
Don't put yourself down for this guy. To me his words sound very hypocritical and he only did this to make himself "bigger". This guy is not worth you esteem, so why waste it for him?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2008): Maybe you a bit clingy or wudn't let him his own space. Guys are very weird about that or maybe he just isn't ready for gf right now and told you that just to have an excuse ....
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