A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My 3 months old boyfriend just dumped me saying he is busy with his career and doesnt feel he is ready. We had been away for 3 weeks and he said although he missed me he felt detached sometimes. Thats why he doesnt want to continue, its not me who is the reason for breakup. I havent talked to him after that(its been 4 days)/neither did he. I have even deactivated my account on facebook. I am not being able to get over him. It seems that when I was going heels over head with my feeling he was just concentrating on how to make his career better. Its so unfair and selfish. I know I shouldnt call him. But this constant urger of seeing /talking to him is killing me. Please suggest what should I do.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 September 2010):
I know you want him to call. And I know you want to know what caused him to change his mind. But he won't call, and you'll never really know the answer to that question. He's just focused on his own life and career at the moment, and has probably saved you a lot more pain in the future.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah I know...the problem its just so hard because I really thought it would work out as he never showed any *detachment* when he was with me. I dont know what happened over 3 weeks and what made him got over me. I have already deactivated my facebook account(deleting him was so hard). I never called him after that/neither did he but still I remember him every moment and wish that he would rethink his decision. Its just so hard :(
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (14 September 2010):
You've really got to move on. Whilst you're hurt and upset and you think he's selfish, he's done you a huge favour. Usually at 3 months, a man will know whether he's right for you or not. This time, he decided that he's not ready and can't commit because of his career. Not your fault. Not anyone's. He just decided he couldn't commit, and thankfully he didn't leave it too long. You need to cut all contact, delete him from facebook and really move on. Don't try to get him back or speak to him, or you'll look desperate and better guys will pass you by.
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