A
female
age
36-40,
*atiehenderson
writes: My boyfriend of 4 years has cheated on me, is over friendly with all his gal pals, always hugging them, getting drunk with them, calling them sweet names, always wanting to be with them, sharing everything with them. He has cheated on me with some of these girls. He says he doesn't want to break up with me. We have broken up before where I kissed another guy. He considers this as cheating whereas I don't cos I was single at that time. He says he doesn't want to break up but he still isn't willing to give up his ways except for cheating, that makes me insecure. He still wants to be with these girls, keep talkin to them all the time, getting drunk with them etc. I want to break up but cannon pucker up the courage to as I feel I will not be able to fall in love again. What do I do?
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cheated on me, drunk, insecure Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, idoneitagain +, writes (1 September 2011):
You are using your fear of not being able to fall in love again as a reason to say in a bad relationship that you don't want to be in. Your fear is not based in reality. You will be able to fall in love again. Either way, no matter what happens in the future, you should do what is right for you now, so that you can work towards creating the future you want.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): Everyone feels like they will never find love again but you will, i promise. I had those feelings and m now in love znd getting married. Dump his ass. You are in love with the idea of this guy. Dont letnhim dump you first.
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A
male
reader, mistermann +, writes (31 August 2011):
He doesn't want to break up with you because he knows that whatever he does you will be there waiting for him. Wouldn't it be nice if there were no consequences for your actions and you could take people for granted and do what you please?
Unfortunately, he shouldn't be given the option to do this. He has got to know that he can't get away with treating you like dirt. And the only way you can let him know is by breaking up with him. You can't let somebody show you such disrespect.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): Easy. You pucker up the courage and break up with him. You're never going to get anywhere in life if you're unwilling to take some calculated risks.
The longer you drag this out and the more time you spend with him the more damaged you will be and the harder it will get. You know all you need to know about this guy.
Your happiness and well being are your responsibility. Take decisive action instead of sitting around waiting for someone else to do the right thing.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): Just end it, there's no future with him that could ever make you happy. He shows you no respect and you are worth so much more than being this mans doormat.
Its not love,,,, you will know that when you find the real thing.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (31 August 2011):
I think you need to pucker up that courage, that is unless you want things to remain exactly the the way they are. If you have fallen in love once, you can fall in love again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): Hang on a minute! It's ok for him to cheat on you and hang out with other girls when he's supposed to be with you, but if you see someone else when you've broken up with him that's cheating!!! Well I thought I had heard everything about men who want to have their cake and eat it, but this takes the biscuit! My advice is dump him. After an attitude like his, the only way is up!
Hope you find someone who treats you right and who is good enough for you. The current one isn't.
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