A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I broke up in June 2014, but then we decided that we waned to be together and work things out. So we are still broken up and we are trying to build our self back into a relationship. He moved back in and the first month he moved back in things was perfect! He treated me so great and we was both so happy and then things turned for the worst. He doesn't tell me he loves me, he doesn't kiss me or hug me or nothing unless I do everything first. He says I don't give him freedom because he wants to hang out with his friends when he wants to. And he says I won't let him. During the week we font have time to do anything or spend time because he works 3rd shift and I go to school Monday - Thursday 5:30-10pm. And then on weekends I have to fight with him to spend time with me because he always wants to be with his friends he always put them first my best guy friend said that I needed to back off him and stop being to needy and clingy and let him hangout with his friends when he wants. He said I should let him hangout with his friends while I'm at school. I have a 3 year old daughter that he watches while I'm at school but my guy best friend says I should always leave it up to my "ex" to watch her because she isn't his. I mean I know we aren't together but we are trying to build a relationship but things are just so hard. He doesn't do things nice for me that shows he loves me or appreciates me. Should we just move on from each other?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2014): If you're not "together" then he shouldn't have moved back in. Obviously you want to spend time with him at weekends, but this guys has babysat your kid, for free, during the week so I can't blame him for wanting some time with his friends.Your best friend is right, your child's dad should be having responsibility looking after your child - of course that's only if it is appropriate for you situation, and best for your child (i say that as I had, and have never had, contact with my real father - so each child is different!) I have taken it from your post that your partner isn't your child's father - sorry if I have interpreted that wrongly.Why can't he have time with his friends either a Friday or Saturday, if not once a week then once a fortnight? Denying him free time is going to lead to him resenting you, you both need your separate interests. Jeez, my husband works ridiculous hours, as do I plus I am in my final degree year, and we look forward to shared time together but that doesn't mean he doesn't see his friends, or go up the gym - just as I will still go running with my girl friends, or out for dinner etc...you both need your own identities and lives because then you have lots to talk about, and you actually really appreciate each other.
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