A
female
age
30-35,
*ee05
writes:hi allmy partner and i have been together for two and a half years now and over the past year or so we have been having less and less sex. I am someone who loves sex and it seems my partner doesnt. we are still young (he is 20 and i will be on sunday) so what is the problem. Tomorrow it will be two weeks since we last had sex and he is fine with this. He will have sex if i go after it but i dont want to have to keep doing this, i want him to come after me for a change.please help i dont know what to do Reply to this Question
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female
reader, lee05 +, writes (3 September 2010):
lee05 is verified as being by the original poster of the question In the beginning we were fine but after a year things started to slow down and we were having less and less sex.
We talk about everything, i cant keep anything from him. I have talked to the lack of sex and he says he doesnt know why he doesnt want it.
We have a 7.5 month old baby together and so i am willing to do anything to keep us together but this lack of sex is definatly effecting us. I cant live my life without the joy of sex.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2010): It's only natural for people's sex drives to decrease once they've been with a partner for however long. Some take longer than others, depending on the person as everyone's different. Some decrease after 6 months!
Anyhow, have you spoke to your boyfriend about this? Telling him exactly how you feel about the situation is always good. When you have sex, what's it like? do you always do the same routine? Maybe you should suggest new things with your boyfriend. It's normal for someone to get bored/a little tired of doing the same thing all the time - Stuff you've never tried.
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A
male
reader, Beingblack  +, writes (1 September 2010):
 After two and a half years, I would have thought that the two of you could talk about anything. The key is talking, not keeping quiet and simmering with frustration.
If you love sex, then tell him. Dont just HOPE he will notice somehow. If you want him to start things off for once, tell him, dont just lay there HOPING. Two weeks without sex could become two months, if you dont SAY something.
It's not that he doesn't find you stunningly sexy, he simply is different to you. Jump on him if you have to, starting sex isnt the mans job, its a two way thing. Take turns. But you need to tell him how you feel, that is most important.
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