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He doesnt seem interested anymore but I dont want to lose him!!

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 February 2007) 5 Answers - (Newest, 12 February 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I have been with my boyfriend for a week and already having problems. I am 17 and he is 22 and i think the age gap is making him have second thoughts.

His friends are the same age as him and all have younger partners. He just doesn't seem interested in me and i am scared that he will cheat.

I really like him and dont want to lose him. what do you think i should do? please reply, thanks

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2007):

To be honest with u girl, he's lost his attraction for u in such a little time.

I t could have been something you said or did or maybe he's just not use to 'a relationship' and thinking about it. also, maybe ur the fierst young girl he's ever dated and desn't really like it because he's used to his age group. It's hard to let go when u like a guy but is it worth getting hurt? why hold on to uncertainty when u don't have to? there r some many guys out there that are certain so forget this guy. press on.

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (5 February 2007):

AskEve agony auntOne week into the relationship and already things aren't working out huh? He's simply not for you love. Finish with him (before he does with you) and move on, you're obviously not compatible. Go out and enjoy yourself, take up a new hobby, keep busy! There's plenty more guys out there you'd get along with much better.

Eve

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2007):

You have only been together ONE WEEK. Look, the purpose of dating is to find out whether two people have enough in common - i.e., their outlook on life, attitudes, interests, actvities they enjoy, etc. to see if there is a basis for a solid, healthy relationship to develop.

Sometimes a good relationship comes about; but other times one or both of you realize you are not a match. One week is barely long enough to know. But you say you are already having problems, and he doesn't seem very interested. These are not good signs.

Hate to say so, but you need to consider that you may ALREADY have lost him. One week is far too soon to be talking "relationship issues" so I don't recommend you tell him how you feel at present. He might not know how HE feels about you, anyway!

As soulsista says, think about whether you are getting what you want out of this. You certainly don't need the drama, and you don't need to be with someone who doesn't make you happy!

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A female reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx United Kingdom +, writes (4 February 2007):

xxxsoulsistaxxx agony auntYou've only been together for a week and you're already having problems: I think this is a clear indication that this relationship is going nowhere. I don't know whether it's because of the age, or maybe there's another reason, but if you don't feel he's giving you enough of what you need then you know the answer to your own question.

I know it's hard when you don't want to lose someone but if he's not who you thought he was or being with him isn't, you have to let him go. There's no point sticking around and being unhappy: walk away with your head held high, knowing you tried your best.

You're 17, you don't need this kind of drama. Leave him to it, let him do what he wants, he sounds like he loves himself more than he will ever love anyone else. You deserve better so get rid of him and have some fun. Don't try and change people, it doesn't work. Get out there and find the guy you really want, not someone who you think you can mould into what you want.

Good luck

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (4 February 2007):

kenny agony auntI don't think the age gap is an issue here, after all its only five years difference.

I think the best thing you can do is be positive, and stop thinking you are going to lose him, or he is going to stray. There is no reason why you should lose him, be open, tell him how you feel about him, and whats on your mind.

Good luck x

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