A
female
age
30-35,
*cythe
writes:Hi aunts,I need some ideas from you. My partner of 6 months and I enjoy what we think is a healthy sex life. I am on the pill and take it between 6.30 and 7am every morning (rain, hail or shine). The problem is, my partner insists on putting a condom on before he orgasms, which means he enters me without a condom and it starts to feel really good for him, but then he stops, and puts one on. After putting the condom on it makes it a lot harder to get him to the point of orgasming. His main reason for wearing one is that he wants to be extra sure I don't become pregnant. I can understand this. However, it bothers me that his pleasure is always cut short or greatly reduced by using a condom.Is there any way we can have proper sex without him wearing a condom, with the smallest chance of me getting pregnant? I'm on sugar pills next week so I thought that if I am on my period it would be even less likely that I could become pregnant.Does anyone have any suggestions or advice?Thanks for reading :)
View related questions:
condom, orgasm, period, sex life, the pill Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, scythe +, writes (12 November 2008):
scythe is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for your thoughtful replies :) I like the umbrella analogy.
I lost my virginity to him, but I have also been tested for STD's. He had one previous partner before me and he offered to get tested but based on his history I didn't pressure him into going.
I do realise about the precum! I even mentioned that to him but he kinda brushed it off and ignored it... strange! His number one reason for putting a condom on is "No bubs" (ie: he doesnt want to have a baby right now).
Ah well, any more advice is appreciated. Maybe I should just be grateful that I don't have to worry about pregnancy that much.
Thanks xx
A
female
reader, violet835 +, writes (12 November 2008):
Well, first things, when taken correctly the pill actually has the highest success rate in preventing pregnancies of any contraception. Secondly, stuff comes out before a guy actually cums, so it's lucky you're on the pill as well, because the way he's using condoms there's still a reasonable chance of you getting pregnant (hence the withdrawal method doesn't come highly recommended). I think the best way to deal with this is just to confront him with the logic. You're on the pill, unless you forget to take it, he really has no reason to worry. Lol if you're one for analogies... It's like it's raining outside, so you go indoors, but then, he pulls out an umbrella. So sure if he wants to carry around an unnecessary umbrella, or in your case, wear an uncomfortable condom then sure he can, but just make it clear to him it's not needed.
...............................
A
female
reader, mixedmetaphores  +, writes (12 November 2008):
Hello! You guys have been seeing each other for a short time, so that trust may not be there yet with him. Many guys are afraid of being "trapped" with a pregnancy. This may justify a reason of his that he is taking precautions not to do this. Maybe it is about disease. If it bothers you, you need to have discussion with him about why he thinks it necessary to wear a condom before ejaculation. Help build that trust between you by letting him know your philosophy on safe sex and what precautions you are taking to protect yourself and him from pregnancy and disease. Get tested together. If you have been sexually active you should be tested for your own knowledge and protection and that of your lovers. It does seem kind of silly since, for proper protection, a condom needs to be worn before any vaginal contact and sperm can be found in all ejaculate or pre-cum, so it may not be due to the pregnancy thing. The same argument goes for the STD angle. At any rate, it's about communication. good luck!
...............................
|
