A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So I don't know if I'm being paranoid or what. But i have been dating my boyfriend for a year. We both have a Facebook and there's something really bothering me.He doesn't mention me or anything about me on there. It bothers me because all the other girls he's dated he's mentioned them on Facebook or posted pictures on there and everything. But with me it's a whole different story.I've asked him why he doesn't mention me on there he says because he doesn't want to put his personal life on there and because every time he mentions a girlfriend on his Facebook they end up breaking up.I feel like i'm not special to him at all anymore. When we first started dating he put stuff on Facebook about me. Don't get me wrong he does everything for me. he gets me anything i want. We live together and he pays for all the bills because i work in a daycare and only when i'm needed. Another problem is he doesn't invite me to go around his friends. since we have been together i have only met 3 of his friends. Everytime i ask about going around his friends he says he doesn't have any because they all have their own life's and don't have time to hangout. But he texts constantly and says hes texting his friends. he goes to his friends house on sunday to watch football but then tells me he has no friends. I always question myself if we ever get married one day if it will still be the same. him not inviting me to do things with him with his friends or family, not letting be around anyone, or mention me on facebook. I had a problem with one of my ex's with this same problem and come to find out he was constantly cheating on me i didn't find out until after he broke up with me out of no where. should I just end this relationship even tho i love him?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 December 2013):
I agree with Cerberus... FACEBOOK is not the issue.
the keeping you from family and friends is a concern.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2013): Follow your gut about it. Do you mention him and your activities together on your Facebook page?
If you do, then it's redundant to just repeat everything over; if you are updating everything anyway.
I think his reason for not mentioning you sucks. I think he's full of bullsh*t. It's like he has an expiration date on your relationship; and just isn't bothering to over-publicize you as a couple. Not acquainting you with his friends adds only more suspicion to his true feelings about your commitment. Why all the other girls and not you?
Because he doesn't want other girls to know he's not single.
He has dismissed your concerns about it. He constantly text messages. If you know it's not family; then it has to be friends, or other girls.
Frankly, speaking. I think he's being sneaky and you're being naive.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2013): OP is he much older than you? I know from experience in age gap relationships you do have to separate your younger partner from your friends a bit as their lack of experience in life can be embarrassing.
Also OP have you ever plastered your facebook with pictures of a boyfriend and loved up statuses only to feel supremely embarrassed when you break up? It's horrible, not something anyone would reasonably want to deal with again.
facebook is irrelevant, but the friends and family thing is very good reason to not trust him unless he can give you a good explanation which he hasn't because there is one other major reason people keep a girlfriend of a year separate from all that, and that's cheating.
Forget the facebook thing but start making a bot more of an effort to get involved in that side of his life. In your position I'd invite his family around for a meal at your place. Invite his friends around to watch the football at your place and use free beer and munchies as the incentive.
Look unless you suspect he';s cheating which doesn't sound like you are don't be too paranoid about all this. He might not be comfortable for other reasons, I mean he did show you off at the start maybe something has changed. Just try and get more involved in that way and see what happens.
If he actively resists your attempts then you know you have a big problem on your hands, but until then don't worry too much.
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A
female
reader, BriannaObelSmith +, writes (31 December 2013):
Maybe he's dating you without telling anybody.. Im not really sure.. But this is kind of weird... Or maybe he doesnt like anybody to know hes dating someone... i really dont know
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