A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi!6 months ago my boyfriend broke up with me. I accepted it and he kept on calling me every two weeks for 3 months... when i asked him whats going on he assured me again that "it was over" and a few days later he called me again saying he was sorry and misses me so much. after this 3 months he went to a language school to spain, called me before he left, telling me he will call when hes back. he did not.I called him up 2 weeks ago and we met up. It was a great date, we had so much fun and so much to talk and we ended up having sex.I did not run after him and one week after that, he called me up and we had such a blast talking to each other again.. he called me every day for 4 days and wanted to see me again but i had to work... on the 5th day he suddenly called me up telling me "he wanted to tell me that he doesnt know what he wants, he wants no relationship right now" and so on...the funny thing is we met up ONCE and i never ever called him (it was always him calling me up) and i NEVER talked about being together again?? he wanted to stay friends but i refused.I fell in a deep hole again. I love him so much and im utterly confused about him changing his mind from one day to another like this!is there anything i can do to get him back? How do you get a man that does not know what he wants out of his comfort-zone?How do i get out of this constant "waiting mode"?Thank you for your time! 3
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Don't be tagging along after a guy who doesn't really want to be with you. He broke up with you and keeps changing his mind whenever it is convenient. You need someone who is completely committed to your relationship and is excited about being with you. Don't just wait around for this guy, because I fear that he will take advantage of you. When he needs some attention or sex, he'll go to you... and when he wants to live a single life, you don't hear from him. That's not fair to you.
So don't wait. Don't let him have cake and it it too. If he wants to have the honor of your attention, love and sex, he should date you exclusively and not play these games. Be firm and be strong, and start building your life beyond him Good luck!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Hi well am afraid you are the one that needs to put your foot down, when you see him next tell him that you arent prepared to sit waiting around forever for him and tell him not to contact you again until he is ready to be in a commited relationship as if he is not ready the both of you need a clean break, so be strict with him, and if he rings you answer and the first thing to ask him is 'are you ready to commit to me' and if he says no then tell him again i dont want you to contact me until you are ready. Keep strong over this and hopefully he will soon realise what he wants. Goodluck
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