A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Over a year ago i got in contact with someone from my past. His marriage was very unhappy and he was there for his children as they meant everything to him.He stopped loving his wife and his marriage had been on the rocks for a couple of years previously.My marriage had ended six months before we were in contact with each other. We fell in love with each other which wasn't expected and we made each other very happy. Even though we were guilt ridden we couldn't stop our affair but I didn't want him to leave his family to be with me.Eventually we were caught. He told his wife he didn't love her but would stay to be with the kids. His wife said she still loved him and wanted him to stay , and in order for him to stay in his home she said he had to break off all contact with me.While all this was going on, I found out that I was pregnant with his child. He said he would support me whatever I chose to do and as I don't believe in abortion I decided to continue with the pregnancy and have the baby with or without him. He told his wife that I was pregnant and then I never heard from him again! I contacted him when our son was born and he told me he was trying to restore his family and wasn't allowed any contact with me or the baby. He said that he meant everyhing he said to me about his feelings for me ,he doesnt love his wife but he cant cope with not being there for his other 3 children and he is not allowed any contact with me or our son at all as he will lose everything.HAS ANYONE BEEN IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS? HAVE WE SEEN THE LAST OF HIM?
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (23 November 2008):
 You should make him pay his share. Both of you created a situation that will last for the rest of your lives. He shouldn't have cheated on his wife and you should have had better morals. At this point you can only help he does the right thing. I don't blame his wife for her demands. If she is willing to take her husband back though, it has to include his new obligations, meaning support payments.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): That's a very sad story. I wasn't in a situation like that, can't imagine how hard it must be on you to go through pregnancy alone and now raising your son alone. Sounds though that he made his choice. Doesn't act much like a man. He does what he is told by his wife,but now he has another child, he should stand up for that. Hope, you will make him pay child support, don't do it all by yourself.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (23 November 2008):
Looks like you have lost him.
I would plan your life as a single mum.
Get support from your friends and family and get a lawyer to contact him about child support. Even if he's chosen to stick with his wife, he still has to help pay for your baby.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, Reesey +, writes (23 November 2008):
Being the othe women is hard position to be in. I do believe if he really loved you he would be with you. Being in a loveless marriage is more damage to the children than being separated. Ten years from know when his children are grown and away he will find another excuse not to leave.Start new with your children and your new son, find someone that will love you and want to be with everyday of your life. But, I would still make this man take the responsibility for your's and his son.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): I read the same type of question before but from the wife point of view! Isn't that strange? or is it the same person making a joke? It's very unlikely both women would go on the same site, asking for advice. Funny joke...not
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