A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Looks like I have to admit defeat. My husband doesn't even want to try and have sex. I tried to suggest it last night. I said "Hun don't you miss me? Don't you want me to PLEASE you?" He knew what I meant by that. And he snapped at me saying "Can't you see I'm watching something on the TV?" so I just said sorry and went to bed. Cried myself to sleep for hours. Then this morning he cuddled me. Really pulled me close to him and I felt this warmth. I really held back because last night I admitted defeat to myself. I can't see this ever getting better. I don't know what to do! What do I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2008): Thanks all :)
A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (17 December 2008):
 Maybe maybe he is having a hard time getting up and dont know how to tell you as it can be rough for a man to talk about.. Maybe you can kinda ask in a gentle way whats going on with him could be a hard time at work or worry about something else all this affects a mans body...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): There can be numerous reasons for his lack of sexual interest or low libido.
The following link explains the reasons and possible causes for low male libido very well. It might help you to get insight into what might be the cause or reason for his lack of interest or low libido.
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/couples/relationshipissues/lowmalelibido
As a start, a good medical check up for him is advisable. If he has a clean bill of health, it might be stress or other related issues, but then I suggest you contact one of the following to give you assistance.
Relate - The low-cost agency for relationship therapy. This can be face-to-face, online, by email or phone.
Brook Tel: 0800 0185023
British Association for Sexual and Relationship Therapy (BASRT) - An organisation of highly qualified sex/relationships experts. Website includes details of how to find a therapist.
Herewith a link giving you lots of information regarding sex therapy.
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/couples/relationshipissues/sextherapy
Don't admit defeat, there is lots that can be done to overcome this problem. Hope these links and information will be of assistance to you and will help you to resolve the problem.
Good luck. Keep us posted.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): I feel for you-really. There is nothing worse than the person you love pushing you away.Relationships are a minefield and they can hurt you a lot even thought the other person may not mean too.Are you married long? Is this the first time this has happened or is it continually? It sounds like your husband doesnt want sex at the moment-but he did cuddle you so it seems like he does want intimacy. (He may be withdrawing from you because he does not want full intercourse for whatever reason and cuddling you because he loves you and doesnt want you to feel hurt). If it is only happening a short time then there may be something bothering him and a reason for it. However if this continues you may both have to seek a counsellor.Sometimes it is hard to see what is going on when you are in the circle and a counsellor will help you to see from outside. What we do have to realise is that we cannot fix people we can only be there to support them while they fix their problems.Basically talk to him first and you may BOTH be able to figure it out, if not ask for help!!If he doesnt want to talk or does and then takes no action then you may be a bit stuck. Same situation if he refuses to talk to a counsellor. In this case there is very little you can do to resolve your sex life as it takes both parties to solve the problem.You could leave him, have an affair (you will only hurt yourself)or try and get on with your life as best you can and hope he comes around.Hope this helps and you are not the only woman in this situation.
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