A
male
age
36-40,
*esonantscythe
writes:I have a serious problem. I’ve been with my first girlfriend for seven months now and I’ve been very happy. However she feels that we do not talk enough about different things. I myself have never been a big talker and was always the type of person to listen and five opinions on things. however, this is no longer enough for her and am at a loss for what to do, I’ve only ever talked to with my friends about certain TV shows and Video games. she does not share these interests with me and i can therefore not talk with her on these subjects. i want to be able to talk to her and make her happy but i am critically lacking in conversational ability and I am afraid i will lose her for what should be only a small problem. Can anyone please help?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): The first step to become a good talker is to listen.
When you become a good listener,you will definitely find things to talk about.
How to become a good listener?Make sure you don't have a magazine or newspaper in hands.Do not watch TV.Set aside a time for all the other stuff.Set aside a special time for her.Look in her eyes while she is talking.She might be yakking about the carpenter who gave her a bad deal while buying furniture.All you need to do is hug her and say,"That jerk did that?Oh honey I am so sorry.Let's find a new carpenter".
Its as simple as that.Though I don't understand the ABCs of gaming,I listen patiently when my husband tries to talk to me about it.Its only fair that she listens sometimes too.
Uncle Phil's idea was great.I bet there would be something common that both of you like.Find out.Make plans.You will have plenty of things to talk about.
All the best.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): I wish I could - but I've got the same problem and I suspect most of the male populations has too!
It's a known fact that a woman can talk forever about everything and nothing at the same time whereas men speak when there's something worth speaking about. Women think that men don't have any interest in them if they're not constantly conversing with them. They are experts in the art of idle chit-chat and men are not. I think it could be something to do with their DNA or chromosomes.
For some reason women feel they have to talk all the time. Men are happy to just sit in a corner reading the paper, grunting occasionally when being talked at and giving the impression that they are actually listening.
Maybe you could try a new hobby that interests you both, giving you some common ground for conversation.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): lol just talk shit to her buddy, trust me she will laugh because you have gotton to that point where there is hardly any conversation so anything will be better then nothing to her. Jsut talk gibberish and try get a reaction out of her, act like a clown, girls like to laugh, and your her b/f you should feel COMFERTABLE and able to do this! goodluck buddy- from germany.
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