A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:im 19 and fallen in love with a 28 year old man he works behind the bar at my local pub, we exchanged numbers i later found out he had a girlfriend and she was pregnant, but carried on textin and then started meeting he split with his girlfirend as he doesnt love her anymore, and we slept together but soon he went back because of his baby, he tells me he loves me all the time but he is scared to leave his baby, he tells me he doesnt love her anymore and that he really loves me and wants to be with me! we still meet up but havent slept together since as its unfair! help me what should i do?
View related questions:
exchanged numbers, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008): I am in this exact situation right now. I have met the "perfect" guy we are extremely well matched and have everything in common. We are totally on the same level. No one can understand this unless they are in a similiar situation. So really only trust the opinion of those going through this. Its hard when you fall for someone, and it does not mean you are both bad people either. You two just fell in love.
The girlfriend being pregnant is a consideration, but IF THEY ARE NOT GETTING ALONG AND HE IS OUT OF LOVE WITH HER. This is not your fault, nor does it make him a bad person. If he no longer loves her, he no longer loves her. You are not bad for wanting to be with someone you love and he wants to be with someone he really loves. He just should have waited till marriage to have children.
This is why people should wait until they get married to have children, because he is not attached to anyone, nor has he comitted to anyone. People may disagree but the traditional society rules make more sense. I do not think he owes the pregant girlfreind anything but a check for child support. This may sound cold but this is my opinion. I do not agree with this modern day out of wedlock kid thing at all.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i just like you to all know he finished with her for me and we had a few months happiness but sadly we grew apart but im now with someone even better thanks for your advice though
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2007): ive been reading ppls answers on here and some of them are really harsh. i have been in a similar situation. i met this guy he had a gf and she was pregnant. i was attracted but i backed off. he left his gf durin several months where he and i didn't ave any contact. we got together a few months later just before his child was born and he did say he was thinking of goin back to her for the childs sake which i understood. he didn't tho and we ended up in a great relationship. its a hard thing to sort thru. you#ve fallen for him badly which can be gd or bad in this case it is bad. you should sit and talk to him like adults and explain how you feel and wot is goin thru your head hopefully ull will make a mutual agreement to either jus b friends and nothing more or he will stay wit her and you 2 neva contact eachova or he will realise that bringing a child up in a loveless relationship is more damaging to the child then their parents being a part but happy. i hope this helps
...............................
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (29 April 2007):
 Move on. He's been a total git to his girlfriend but he's doing the right thing now by being there for the baby. Whether he loves his girlfriend or not he has responsibilities to his child now and owes it to the kid to grow up in a two parent family if possible. If you know a man has a girlfriend try to back off a bit. After all, if he was your boyfriend how would you feel if some other girl was coming onto him at a time when you were vulnerable? Cut off contact with him asap and try to find a single guy.
CD
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2007): leave! fast! you need to get out of this destructive relationship. you are the one who will get hurt. this guy is a rat! if he is sleeping with you while his girlfriend is pregnant then who's to say you are the only one? if i was you id tell him that i dont want to see him again when he next texts....then make an appointment with your doctor to get checked for STD's. i cant say it enough....he is a two(or three, or four or even more)-timing rat! you need to protect yourself. feel sorry for his girlfriend and his baby. good luck
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2007): what should you do? what should you do?!?! leave it! he's got a pregnant girlfriend and doing that to another female if you as me is pretty low consitering you wouldn't want it to happen to you and with this guy I'm pretty sure it will happen if he's doing that. get rid of him you only going to cause pain for his kid and his gf and you don't want to do that do you? this guy is not worth it
...............................
|
