A
male
age
30-35,
*ubjub
writes:Hey people. My boyfriend and I have been dating since the 24th of March and I've become really attached to him, however we had sex on the first date, and we have rarely met up to do anything other than lie in his bed other than maybe once or twice. Also, when we were dating we never saw each other for usually a week, if not weeks between meeting up. He finished with me (on MSN!) last night and he said he really liked me, but he couldn't face not seeing me for weeks at a time as it's breaking both of our hearts. But we've had reasons not to see each other until now as there have been school things and college things on, along with exams. And now we've got a whole summer ahead of us where we could spend everyday together if we wanted, but he's said we should stop and he can't get into his head that we can fix this relationship. I love him, and he's been crying his eyes out since he ended it apparently but I don't see why we should end. He has the idea in his head that we're not going to have time together over the summer, but we can and we'll have loads of time. We were even planning camping trips and trips to the beach, I don't know what has changed and he's not being logical.*We live 40 minutes away and yeah, we're both gay.Please can someone help me! :(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007): he's clearly not interested in this relationship, move on as if he wanted to spend time with you he would make time. i think he's trying to give a reason that wont hurt you other than he's not interested. maybe he is not comfortable in himself.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (12 July 2007):
 In my opinion, he wants to end it. He's very logical if you base your thoughts on this. He won't listen to you about the time together because he doesn't want to.
In my opinion, it was also very bad that he finished with you on MSN. I don't think you'd win anything by insisting.
Sometimes you need to look at subtle details. He says that the separation breaks his heart AND yours. But, you don't seem heartbroken over this; the break-up does seem to affect you, and yet he keeps saying it's for the better. Is that logical? Of course not. Unless you accept that he wants to finish it.
Sorry if my being so direct is also being harsh but, you know, I've come to realize this is best. Doubt kills; your mind and your heart are always better off if you have solid ground on which to build.
Best,
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