A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My ex and I were together just over a year, we then had a few difficulties and spilt for about a month, we had time apart to think, do our own thing etc. We then got back together, made sure things were sorted, that we wern't making the same mistakes again etc, and thing's were going really well in general, with a few issues due to him changing jobs and having a new working pattern but we talked openly and sorted thing. We were back together for around 2 months, then he said he wanted to end things, he said that he was still in love with me and that I meant so much to him, but he thought that I could do better without him and that he wasn't making me happy, I of course told him that I wanted to be with him and that he made me happy, but he said that he felt he was holding me back, and that he wanted to see me happy and that we should split. I really want to be back in a relationship with him, and am unsure on what to think or do. Anyone had a similar situation or have any help and advise?
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female
reader, R1 +, writes (17 April 2013):
You could try and find out the real reason he wanted to end it, as previous posters said he just gave you a line there. But ultimately if he doesn't want to be with you then there is nothing you can do about it. Get out there and look like you are having a great time without you, if it doesn't bring him back at least you will show him you can be fun and happy!
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (17 April 2013):
I doubt that he is such a noble , selfless individual to break up just to see you happier.
If that were the problem,i.e. that he thinks you are not happy enough with him- your opinion should count more than his, shouldn't it ? I mean, you told him that this is not the case at all, and that you are in fact happy with him, he should trust you to know what makes YOU happy, not decide for you .
I think this is a cliche', and what he means deep down is that HE wants to be happier. Probably the issues that brought you to the first break up have been sorted out ,explored, talked about on surface, rationally, nevertheless have left anyway some sort of bitter aftertaste emotionally.
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A
female
reader, doggysmoo +, writes (17 April 2013):
I'm not you or him, but sometimes advice I give is really meant for myself. In this instance, maybe he actually wanted the split and that is his way of being nice about it. Maybe he is having doubts that he could be happier. On the flip side, maybe he's being honest and does think you're happier without him. If you honestly believe he's wrong then talk with him and tell him how unhappy you are now that you're not with him. Maybe he needs time to realize that. Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2013): "we then had a few difficulties and spilt for about a month"
What were the "difficulties"? You're asking us our opinion on why a resolution didn't work out, but you've told us nothing about the conflict.
If "difficulties" were him telling you should be open to a threesome, I'd probably say you just saved yourself a huge headache. If "difficulties" mean you cheated on him I'd probably say he's leaving you because he doesn't trust you, and he's just being diplomatic with his reasons.
There's no way anyone can comment on what happen unless you provide a little background on the conflict.
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