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age
36-40,
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writes: Repeat Offender: Me and my boyfriend have been dating for over 2 1/2 yrs. We have a really good relationship. But when we do fight it is mostly about the same few things. Every time we fight we don't yell we sit and talk things out. The problem he has which Im sure most men do, is he never stops and thinks before he says things. He wants so bad to defend himself that he yells out the first thing he can think of. He always ends up saying something that makes me upset. And when I ask him why he would say something like that, he really doesn't know. So he tries to blame me for the things he says even tho he knows its not my fault. It upsets me when he blames me. So we talk about it and he always says he doesn't know why he does it and he is trying to never do it again. So my question is, if he keeps doing this how can I prove to him that I am really serious about wanting him to stop? I can't keep giving him a chance to change, it has to end somewhere. But I don't want to break up beacuse of something like this. Every time he does it I tell him I am serious. He always feels really bad. He's not a bad person. Most of the time it's just the fact that he keeps doing it after he says hes not, that upsets me. How can I help him to slow his thoughts and stop and think? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, accused  +, writes (5 August 2007):
 What kind of things does your BF say blurt out? I mean does he call you out of your name?, bring up past mistakes? I could give better advice if I knew what it was he was saying to you.... Hope to hear from you soon... Accused
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