A
female
age
30-35,
*ittle bad girl
writes:Well here goes it all started in march 2011 I met this truly wonderful guy well at least at that time I thought he was. we first slept together when I was 17 then by june of that year we split up I saw a dramatic change in him. he was very bad tempered and blamed me for the breakup. we didn't speak for 8 months and it was him that made the move to get in touch with me. since that time we have had an on off relationship and he still always blames me for the things that go wrong in the relationship. he is now with a member of my family and last week we spoke abouy mt moving house to be near him but because I coudnt get the money for the deposit on a flat he ended it with me as he always does. its complicated I know but I still love him and don't know what I should do. please help
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female
reader, little bad girl +, writes (31 May 2012):
little bad girl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for ur advice helped a lot x
A
female
reader, Aunt Liz  +, writes (30 May 2012):
"it's hard when you know it's your heart you can't trust", that's from a song, can't take credit for it. This guy isn't good for you. He'll just wear you down. It isn't healthy and things will only get worse. Put some distance between you and this guy. Get out and spend some time with friends and people who are kind and respectful to you. You may be surprised by how much better you start to feel. Sometimes when you are in the middle of a situation you are too close to see it. Back up a bit and get a look at the big picture. Be honest with yourself. I'm willing to bet that he has you conned into thinking that he needs you and somehow you've let him down so now you owe him. You owe yourself a good life with people who treat you right. Always easier said than done, but be strong because you ate worth it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2012): If you profess to "still love" a "truly wonderful guy" who quickly proved himself to be a bottom-feeding abusive scumbag who has done nothing but degrade, debase and dumanize you, then you need immediate, intensive, lomg-term counselling.
You must be a desperately unhappy, confused, misguided teenager with lots of childhood baggage and huge emotional voids in your life to be clinging to this jerk.
Please find a way to get the help you so desperately need, if you have no other option go to your nearest hospital emergency to get connected with the services you so DESPERATELY need (emphasis deliberate).
Best wishes, I hope you can overcome whatever has led you down this path and eventually become an emotionally healthy young woman.
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A
female
reader, VSAddict  +, writes (30 May 2012):
 Stop having anything to do with him. If he loved you, he would be trying to make it work and not blaming you for everything. A relationship can't fall apart because of one person. He needs to take some of the responsibility. So he's with a member of your family and expects you to move closer to him? That's selfish and low, you're not even together. This guy is only thinking about himself. Don't make any life changes for him. The only thing you need to do is keep him out of your life.
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