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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: here it goes....my boyfriend and i have been together for five months....he lives at home right now and he always asks me to spend the night...i have a couple times but for the most part i usually say maybe not tonight.....i guess im just scared for some reason..and me not staying the night kinda makes him mad....i dont know what to say we keep getting in arguments about it i dont know why i feel like that and i just wish he'd understand...what should i say or do? i dont like it when hes mad at me.... (and no he doesnt abuse me or push me into anything hes just kinda tempermental)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2007): thank you your advise is helping....i guess i was just scared because im afraid to get close to anyone im afraid of getting hurt i want to be close to him (and no there was no sex when i slept over)and now i know why i do these things im trying to stop and let my gaurd down......again thankyou youve all really helped me just take a sec and think and i thankyou.....
A
female
reader, Reebe  +, writes (10 January 2007):
 whats the problem with spending the night? until you figure this out then you won't be able to solve it. I can understand him being a bit annoyed as he probably wants to sleep in the same bed as you and wake up with you in the moning. If he gets annoyed because you won't have sex woth him then thats completely different no one should ever presure you into sex and if he doesn't like it then he knows where the door is. Look after yourself.
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A
female
reader, dragonette  +, writes (10 January 2007):
 I think you should try to find out why you're scared of spending the night.
You say he lives at home, does that mean with his parents? I can understand you're uncomfortable with spending the night there then.
Does "spending the night" mean having sex or just staying over to sleep in each other's arms?
If it's the first option I don't think a guy has the right to get mad with his girlfriend for not having sex with him. And it's important you make him understand that, otherwise this relationship won't be very good for you.
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