A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 22 and there's a male colleague in my workplace I used to fancy. Our age difference and his bad habits (smoking and drinking) puts me off. I took an interest in him when I started, as he helped me settle in. We got on very well, until recently when my lust faded and I've gone off him. He is currently single and asks me every now and again if I still fancy him. We can still have a bit of a laugh and I worry that if I tell him the truth he will turn against me, which will make work for me less happy. What should I do? Please advise.
View related questions:
workplace Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (4 August 2008):
Just let him down gently. He's obviously just after an ego boost and you can give him that without saying "I MUST HAVE YOU NOWWWWWWWW!!!"
Tell that you still think he's the most gorgeous man in the office but it wouldn't work because you prefer to date none smokers. Or something small like that. Tell him your cat is asthmatic, or that all your kids would be born deformed or something.
The key is to move the conversation slightly sideways and turn the "I fancy you" into silliness about how you've picked out the baby names, and have chosen your engagement ring. You can accuse him looking at the (97 year old) tea lady and say he's broken your heart. He'll enjoy the flirting but it won't be serious any more and you can chill out a bit.
He may even cut down on the smoking and drinking if he realises it's a turn off for women, then you'll have saved him life and that is some damn good Karma.
Good Luck!! xx
|
