A
female
age
26-29,
*alesia1995
writes:My boyfriend and I have been dating almost a year. We finally met each others parents. We don't hangout that much cause he works al the time the only day we WOULD have to ourselves is Sunday. But when he has free time he rather spend it with his friends. After we have sex his mom calls and ask him to come do stuff for her and he say he coming back back and never does till almost 3 in the morning. When he comes back I act like i'm sleep so we won't have sex. How do I get back on the path to really enjoying my life He accuses me of cheating, yet some part of me saying he cheats and some part saying i'm over reacting. What can I do? Advice needed please? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (16 March 2015):
 "you're cheating on me"
"you may be right, let's take a break and I'll think about your feelings and get back to you on it"
then RUN to the nearest relationship exit.
If he can't manage to see you for dinner, movies, dates, hanging with friends etc.. and only shows up for sex.. the relationship has past it's expiration date.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 March 2015):
 I think you have both removed yourselves from the relationship. First of all, if you don't LIVE together, he doesn't NEED to show up at 3 am.
He only SEES you for sex? The rest of the week (6 days) he rather hang out with friends? Yes, he might be busy with work, but if he has TIME for his friends, he would have time for you.
I would NOT be OK with him accusing you of cheating and I have to ask, WHAT do you say to those accusations? And why does he think you are cheating?
You two don't communicate very well and I think you both want out. The "cheating" thing is what you BOTH seem to use.
Are you happy with how things are? If not talk to him, see if there is anything you two can DO together to fix it, OR walk away.
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A
female
reader, MoniqueEE  +, writes (15 March 2015):
Are you even happy in this relationship?
Have you thought about that?
Forget about his accusations for a moment and think about you. Only you are responsible for your own happiness and enjoying yourself.
If he is not adding to it, either tell him so you can work it through or take a break all together. If you find you're happier without him, there's your answer.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (15 March 2015):
 I hear about the theory that people who accuse are the ones who are doing it. But some guys accuse just to see your reaction because they desperately want to know and they stupidly think the only way to know is to accuse. It's wrong but the message is they don't want you to cheat. They create images in their heads of other guys on you to torture themselves and then make you reassure it's not true. Guys do that when they are busy or have to be away for a while. They can't overcome the fear of you being snatched away so they are always preparing being cheated on. The dangerous thing is when you repeat a thought often it becomes a reality in the mind. I tried, it is impossible to reason with them. I tried saying if you don't want to cheat, I don't want to either. I tried swearing to god, saying if I ever intend to cheat really bad things would happen to me. The fear is still there.
You have to say accusing you is not the right way to go, and that he's the only guy in your mind, the only guy who makes you happy. I know, that's what he wants to hear but do you honestly think you are happy? He can't just spend so little time with you then accuse you of cheating. With guys, if you complain you are nagging, controlling his time and if you don't complain, you are complacent or may be up to no good. You have to decide if you can be with someone so unreasonable.
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