A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:i've been married for 20 years and fell out of love with my husband and now having an affair with a married man which i know he loves his wife and probably will never leave her.I've know him for a couple of months but whenever were together there's a special bond between us.what do i do i'm fallen madly in love.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): My husband of 24 years had an affair for most of last year and I am now an emotional wreck. Before this happened I was always open minded that people do have affairs but I had never been on the receiving end of one before. The pain and turmoil I am going through is unbearable. I beg you to stop this affair so many people are going to get hurt and you will be one of them if you get caught. The other thing you should do is leave your husband if you are so unhappy or try and resolve the problems you have (there must be a problem or you wouldn't be looking elsewhere). Then find yourself a single man.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2009): I too am in an affair with a married man, and all I can offer is my side of this. I have been divorced for 7 years, and have not dated since the breakup of a 20+ year marriage as I had kids to raise, and work, and decided to wait until they were older. Then "He" came along; asked me out a number of times, and I said No always as I knew he was married. One day we accidentally ran into each other at a store, and brushed against each other, and he leaned over to kiss me. I resisted, but felt such a strong attraction, that I caved. We met a number of time over the past month, and have phenomenal sex due to the physical attraction. Now I know I want more in a "relationship" and I hardly ever see him because he works 12 hours a day, and IS married (kids grown), and I feel like crap when I don't hear from him for days, but then when we do get together, it is such bliss, and it has motivated me since I do feel (albeit stupidly) loved. So while I know I should end it for my sanity, I can only enjoy it for the moment!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2009): He's married! What is wrong with you? Find a man that is single.......end the relationship now or very bad things will happen to you! It's women like you that is the reason the divorce rate is so high!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2009): I don't recommend that you go into another relationship. Relationships like that start out nice and rosy but when it progresses and your relationship with your previous husband will be over, your "new" relationship will fall back into the right perspective.
Your husband will know, my husband senses me the moment a have a desire to be with someone else. And oftentimes I have these crazy ideas of finding something better, more romantic, someone who shares more of my interests.
I think the reason why you asked this question is because you feel bad for what you had already done and you want some support.
Not to shame you or make you feel bad, being bored in a marriage is not a brand new phenomenon, we all want things to be exciting, romantic and ideal in our love lives.
But think about the reality and get out of your rosy garden at the moment where everything seems so "fine and dandy"! Wake up. Your husband will leave you. Your so called "lover" will prob. cheat on you just like he cheated on his wife once he gets bored of you as well.
The grass is not greener on the other side, and once you start on these adventures it doesn't make it easier to be with someone new, you are emotionally attached to your husband and so is his wife to him. When we loose someone from our life, handsome or not the hottest thing on earth, we feel emotional loss. You need to work on your marriage, solve its problems, tell your husband that it is not romantic enough and don't say it lightly.
When are stupid and romance, they have no clue how to spice things up for their wife. Ask him to caress you, to hold you, to touch you, teach him how to touch you, don't be afraid.
You are not madly in love, this man prob. looks somewhat better, maybe has less weight put on or the face/eyes look better to you, or they resemble your mother or father.
Many reasons as to why you are attracted to men like that. They are prob. your weakness.
But you need to do the right thing, the moral thing, the thing that would be better for everyone involved, to work on your old garden and plant new growth where the rotten life is, to begin replenishing your own garden, and you'll see that there is tremendous opportunity at your own garden, you just need to do the necessary work to make it come back to life!
And forgive yourself about past mistakes, don't let your husband know, but forget about the other man, make your own husband feel secure about his image, he has been with you for 20 whole years, that's an artwork, don't loose this masterpiece, you need to get touch-ups.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2009): I don't recommend that you go into another relationship. Relationships like that start out nice and rosy but when it progresses and your relationship with your previous husband will be over, your "new" relationship will fall back into the right perspective.
Your husband will know, my husband senses me the moment a have a desire to be with someone else. And oftentimes I have these crazy ideas of finding something better, more romantic, someone who shares more of my interests.
I think the reason why you asked this question is because you feel bad for what you had already done and you want some support.
Not to shame you or make you feel bad, being bored in a marriage is not a brand new phenomenon, we all want things to be exciting, romantic and ideal in our love lives.
But think about the reality and get out of your rosy garden at the moment where everything seems so "fine and dandy"! Wake up. Your husband will leave you. Your so called "lover" will prob. cheat on you just like he cheated on his wife once he gets bored of you as well.
The grass is not greener on the other side, and once you start on these adventures it doesn't make it easier to be with someone new, you are emotionally attached to your husband and so is his wife to him. When we loose someone from our life, handsome or not the hottest thing on earth, we feel emotional loss. You need to work on your marriage, solve its problems, tell your husband that it is not romantic enough and don't say it lightly.
When are stupid and romance, they have no clue how to spice things up for their wife. Ask him to caress you, to hold you, to touch you, teach him how to touch you, don't be afraid.
You are not madly in love, this man prob. looks somewhat better, maybe has less weight put on or the face/eyes look better to you, or they resemble your mother or father.
Many reasons as to why you are attracted to men like that. They are prob. your weakness.
But you need to do the right thing, the moral thing, the thing that would be better for everyone involved, to work on your old garden and plant new growth where the rotten life is, to begin replenishing your own garden, and you'll see that there is tremendous opportunity at your own garden, you just need to do the necessary work to make it come back to life!
And forgive yourself about past mistakes, don't let your husband know, but forget about the other man, make your own husband feel secure about his image, he has been with you for 20 whole years, that's an artwork, don't loose this masterpiece, you need to get touch-ups.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009): I don't think anyone posted to judge you. We have all had problems in life. No one can give you an opinion for both sides unless they know the whole story. You are given an opionion purely on what you posted.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt's not what you think it is i've only wrote down what i see fit that who ever is reading this should know and would like a friendly advice i would'nt want to go down in full details , it would take forever!and so before you judge or asume you should know the whole story from both sides!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): I don't think you love this man. I think you are in lust of some type of fantasy of what you think your life could be. It looks good now but if he's cheating on her with you even if he did leave her don't you think he would cheat on you too? Then I am wondering..Have you ever been cheated on? I don't think you have any clue how bad it hurts. You need to come clean to your husband or divorce. I think the only reason you are staying in this marriage is because you don't want to be alone.
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A
male
reader, roadman  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Enjoy what you got and what you are getting don't let small detail damage that special feeling you are both feeling..
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A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Well first of all if he truly loved his wife he wouldnt do it! And 2nd of all to mess with another womans hubby is a no no ! Ive been there with my hubby and can tell you we are now going through a divorce it is a very hurtful thing to find out the man you love and thought loved you is now cheating ... I think you should step back and rethink what you are doing and if you are unhappy with your hubby get a divorce its a scary thing but it is the right thing if you arent in love with this man dont keep string him along everyone deserves to be loved and if you dont someone else will . And if the married man you are seeing is in love with his wife step away but if he isnt then ask him if he is willing to leave her so you 2 can start a relationship if not then go on with your life seeking a man that is single and compatible with you.
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