A
male
age
51-59,
*eew
writes:I have recently been dumped by my girlfriend of 6 years.I love her dearly and believe she loved me but we stopped communicating in the right way. We have been falling out over silly things and not speaking for weeks in the end. We once split up for 6 month without speaking the whole time yet came back together in the end. We split up a few month back over a silly argument and. Went away for a while to clear my head. During this time I found I truly missed her and tried to contact her only to receive horrid messages returned (this was the usual thing) and when I returned she was waiting for me.She told me she loved me very much and had been out on a date with another man yet it wasn't me, it was me she loved and me she wanted. Then after a week, another argument simlply because I said I wished a night to myself and she accused me of having someone else. We spoke a few days later when again she told me she loved me, but I was angry at her and told her to stop the accusations, moods etc and wouldn't take it anymore, didn't see a point to the relationship that we had ended up with.Then 4 days later I discovered she had arranged another date with the man she said she didn't want and has been with him for 6 weeks now.To say it devastated me would be a understatement. It felt as tho my whole world came crashing down.I contacted her begging her to stay as I only wished to find a middle ground and end the arguments not completely finish. I doubted our communication but never our love and don't think she did either.Since that night she has refused any contact with me, won't speak to me, reply to any messages and when she walked by me last week would not even look in my direction and is asking as tho she hates me so much now which hurts even more.While I many times thought about ending it, I never had the strength to quit on her or us. Yet she did and it made me feel like I didn't matter etc.I have wondered if this is a rebound and she will return and spend each night pining for her and watching my phone hoping she will miss me and make contact.It seemed as tho she walked away so easily and moved straight onto another relationship without any sorrow or regret while I remained in limbo with all the pain, anguish and hurt.Guess I am simply looking for a sign she didnt do this lightly. Something inside me says she still loves me but for some reason is fighting it and telling herself and those around her she hates me.The hatred I feel from her toward me is eating away at me slowly, and nothing I can do will bring her back or even get her to speak to me.
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male
reader, bronzed adonis +, writes (27 August 2012):
 Do yourself a big big favor and let her stay lost forever.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): Aw I feel for you if you ask me she's playing mind games and playing hard to get! She obviously has no interest in this other man and is using him to get back at you basically she wants you to grovel to her don't do it wait a bit longer I know it's hard get out a bit more keep yourself busy if it's meant to hedge will come back and do all the begging x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): You had a lucky escape.
Leave her alone now and start the healing process,no more contact.You tried your best.
Good Luck x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): I say move on because she doesn't deserve a man like you.
Don't worry, her relationship with this new guy will not last for long, she's making a move too fast on her emotions and when that comes to an end then she will want you back but I would let her go, she's cold as ice!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): I say move on and find someone better...don't worry, her relationship with her new boyfriend will not last long, she's making a move too fast on her emotions, she'll want you back after that comes to an end, I wouldn't take her back because she doesn't deserve a man like you.
You'll gonna hurt as we all do after a breakup but be strong.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): Its sounding like she has moved on man, sorry to tell you. I dont think its that she walked away so easily but because she has found someone else for herself so easily. He was waiting for her fall and got what he wanted, to comfort her and tell her what she wants and to make you out as the bad one in the wrong.
Honestly man i think you deserve better, she went out and dated this guy while you two hit a rough patch. That shows how good she is willing to hang through those tough times with you and just how much she loves you. Not trying to hurt you but thats how it is man, find someone who truly cares for you and dont let the communication stumble again. Learn from your mistakes man, wish ya the best with what ever you choose to do.
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A
male
reader, mistermann +, writes (27 August 2012):
It seems to me like you've tried to lay down the law, set down what you want from the relationship and attempt to resolve/discuss the things that make you unhappy. It's completely the right thing to do, communication is one of the key building blocks for every relationship.
Whether you did it in the right way or not by saying that you didn't see the point in the relationship you had ended up with is questionable. But, we all have a right to be angry and upset, and I can completely understand that you wanted to give her a wake up call and start to do something about your relationship.
I do, however, find the reaction of your girlfriend worrying. After an argument like that, arranging to see another man is the reaction of somebody that has given up.
She will of course still feel something for you, feelings don't disappear overnight. The question is whether or not those feelings are strong enough to get your relationship back on track.
If she doesn't want to communicate with you or attempt to resolve your issues, there isn't anything you can do about it. Continuing to attempt to communicate and convince her that she still loves you will probably only inflame the situation further. You can't keep chasing her.
If she has decided to move on, then, unfortunately, the only option is for you to do the same.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): you dont lose people like her, they are not exclusively yours (or anybody`s) to begin with. i think you should be saying good riddance.
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