A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:There is a girl I work with we have known each other for 9 months. For three of those months we were casually dating but we only went on a few dates but we would talk regularly every day.Just when things we starting to get serious her father was diagnoised with cancer. So like any good person I took a step back and tried to support her any way possible. With everything she had going on she became more and more distant. this continued on to the point were we stopped talking and seeing each other except for work. I wasn't ready for this i felt like i lost more than a girl i like i felt like i had lost a friend. So i did what anyone else would do I went looking for companionship in other place. I eventually met a girl who was nice but not the same. So i decided to express my feeling to the girl at work one last time and lay it out there. Even though later i found out that she felt the same way in the moment it was not felt. So of course I went to hang out with the other women to get my mind away from everything. By random chance the girl from work happened to see me out with this new girl which basically made me feel there was no chance for salvation with the girl from my work. Even though I eventually broke up with the new girl I dated other women including another girl from work and even though we kept things private the original girl who I still loved very much found out. Shortly after she confessed her love for me and the she was just not ready for a relationship. This was fine with me because i knew she cared. Ever since things have been awkward for both of us she looks at me as if all i want is other women and that i am not trust worthy. While i look at her in confusion for not seeing that the only reason the other women exist is because i felt i tried and tried and it just wasn't our time. I need some serious advice. I love her and want to feel that I haven't lost her.I know it but i also feel that I never really had her as my Gf after she became distant.
View related questions:
at work, broke up, girl at work, I work with Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (4 January 2013):
How do you suppose she can read your mind and know that you were distracting yourself with other women? Not a good idea by the way but what’s done is done. So if this lady has confessed her love for you and you think it could work, confide in her and ask her for a fresh start. You never really got off the ground last time so try dating and starting over again. Don’t expect her to just work out what you want for herself, take the lead for sorting this out. If it means owning up to the fact that you were seeking companionship because you thought it was never going to happen between you, be honest with her about that. Maybe you’ve made mistakes and handled things perhaps not in the best way but she wants to see you being truthful. If she thinks she’s just one woman for you and that you can quickly replace her with another, she’s not going to consider you dating material. You’ve got to tell her that this is wrong.
I wish you all the very best.
|
