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female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Did you ever experience,in your life,that no matter,what you do,nothing goes right?I feel ,Im trying to make good choices everyday, but from the smallest things to the biggest, almost everything turns out wrong or a nightmare. Like in a bad movie,the main character, always gets into trouble, even if he did everything right.Like how you wake up and start your day,and trying to go in time ,to catch the next flight, but there is a broken shower,a flood in your bathroom a road block, and you try to do this again and again, but there is always chain of bad luck stops you to get there, and you get so exhausted that you give up, ,to ever get there,and get this job, or so on. So ,I hope,I could describe it on a way ,you can understand,and cant say its because ,im weak, or too negative. Or if you think ,I'm please tell me how can I do it better? But it is not about small things like that, much bigger,and more painful incidents are keeping me in total hopelessness. It's about repeating over and over again..Feels like a spell. Can you relate to this? Reply to this Question
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reader, spiderweb  +, writes (24 August 2010):
 I went through the same thing and it lasted two years. Got to the point where I thought it was a good sign if the traffic light turned green as I approached! It's only when you look back in a year or two's time that you'll recognise that the pattern of bad luck has shifted, but it's a nightmare whilst it is happening. Obviously, life is made up of good and bad times/things, but these phases are different and can easily give the impression that the entire Universe if out to get you! It will pass. Try and focus on the small good things that occasionally happen and focus on talking yourself out of being negative, as I am convinced that our lives can become a "self-fulflling prophecy" of bad luck if we repeatedly insist that the only luck we have is the bad kind.
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reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (24 August 2010):
You're trying far too hard to prove far too much. You know you are not required to be perfect! You are allowed to screw up, to get angry, to be depressed sometimes, to have a bad day and to make bad choices. That's what humans do. Things go wrong, and they are allowed to go wrong. How you react to that is what matters. You seem to be taking every little thing as either a personal attack or something that reflects how you are and makes you seem bad to everyone. I know how that feels. I used to take everything personally. Then I lost my job, and suddenly I realized that sometimes, shit happens and all you can do is deal with it as best you can. So I set my own company up. That's closed now because I couldn't get the clients and didn't earn the money I needed. My reaction? Shit happens and I just have to deal with it. Maybe it is a spell, but you can get away from the hopelessness by not being so harsh on yourself so much and giving yourself a break. Most of the things that went wrong in your list weren't your fault. It is repetitive, but it's just something that has to be worked through. You seem to be expecting a lot of yourself and just letting it get to you. If it's not your fault, who cares? Yes the shower broke. But it can be fixed. Yes, there is a roadblock. But you'll get through it. You just need to accept that at times things will be out of your control. Once you do that, things won't get to you so much.
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female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (24 August 2010):
 Yes! There's that saying "bad things always happen in threes". Well for me it seemed like 6. I got myself caught in a whirlwind of where nothing went right, my break-up went nasty, ex threw out my stuff andI had no where to go, took my stuff and stayed with my friend, tried to get a second job but that's when the economy started going down the drain, job cut my hours, had to move back on with my parents, and I lost my car because I had no job for 4 months, It's like you can't be happy, positive thinking went out the door because it seemed hopeless. How do you get out of it? Well, it does take some time, and some positive thinking such as "I'm a good person I've never done anything to deserve anything things, pretty soon something will give and the bad will stop for awhile." Remember life isn't perfect and doesn't always go the way we want it..the key is to stay as positive as you can through the negative then positive things will happen. It's too easy to be negative and give into frustration and anger.
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