A
female
age
30-35,
*heeky Madam
writes:Hi well this is my first post on here so here it goes.There is this guy at work, whom I really like, but we are both with people. We have been flirting even though a friend has told me he's not worth it.Well today as I was walking out the office he followed me out and as we came out the door he hit me on the backside with the papers he was holding, however another guy came out the office at the same time and was like omg did I just see that??? I was so embarrassed I didn't know what to do so I just laughed it off. But later on he told me that I was too distracting in the skirt I was wearing (pencil skirt) and that he couldn't concentrate when I was around. Not sure if this was an excuse for what he did??I'm concerned now that he may have draw attention to us, not sure what I should do to help this die down? Do I change what I wear so he does get distracted or will this draw as much attention to it as I will be wearing different cloths after what happens? No one else appears to be affected by my clothing. Any ideas on how to help this die down??
View related questions:
at work, flirt Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (13 February 2013):
 The way to sort this issue out - STOP FLIRTING.
Cut contact with him down to a minimum, if he touches you explain that it is inappropriate and that you are asking him not to do so.
If he continues to stalk you - go to your HR department and complain!
A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (12 February 2013):
 Hi Cheeky Madam,
You can help it die down by stopping the flirting. If he oversteps the boundaries, make it clear that it's not OK.
But to be honest it sounds as if you enjoy it and you're more concerned about office gossip than the fact you both have partners?
...............................
A
female
reader, llifton  +, writes (12 February 2013):
 Well if you don't like the attention, you need to TELL HIM. Not just be subtle about it and hope he gets the hint. That's the problem with women sometimes. We don't like to be vocal about the things we have every right to be vocal about. You didn't invite him to smack your ass with papers because you were wearing a skirt. it's his responsibility to have some self control. You shouldn't have to change what you wear because a guy can't control his impulses. That's just ridiculous.Keep wearing whatever you're most comfortable in, and if he crosses the line one more time, tell him to stop. That simple. and if he persists, well then you report him to a boss, etc. Now if you like the attention, that's a whole different story.
...............................
A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (12 February 2013):
 You said it yourself: you've been flirting. You've basically been disrespecting your current partner. It sounds like you don't know what you really want, and you probably should give your current boyfriend respect by breaking up with him. That way, you can flirt all you want and he's not going to worry about trusting you once things get even more out of hand. You're also going to affect his girlfriend. You two are being kind of selfish and inconsiderate of your partners. It's not just what you're wearing. Your actions are saying that it's ok.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 February 2013):
 it's easy
you stop flirting with him in any way that could be misconstrued as leading him on. You remember that you have a partner that you love and don't want to lie to or cheat on (and remember anything you can't won't or don't tell is cheating in my book)
and you tell him "the other day you hit me on the bum with some papers. I want you to know I found this unprofessional and upsetting. Please do not take the liberty to invade my personal space again"
Trust me the guy who said "omg did i just see that, is not thinking twice about it"
I have lots of male colleuges and I can be rather flirtatious with them...no one questions anything...
and I wear short skirts to work regularly... (and i'm no spring chicken but i'm pretty attractive for an old lady)
...............................
|
